• Hey Guest,

    We wanted to share a quick update with the community.

    Our public expense ledger is now live, allowing anyone to see how donations are used to support the ongoing operation of the site.

    👉 View the ledger here

    Over the past year, increased regulatory pressure in multiple regions like UK OFCOM and Australia's eSafety has led to higher operational costs, including infrastructure, security, and the need to work with more specialized service providers to keep the site online and stable.

    If you value the community and would like to help support its continued operation, donations are greatly appreciated. If you wish to donate via Bank Transfer or other options, please open a ticket.

    Donate via cryptocurrency:

    Bitcoin (BTC):
    Ethereum (ETH):
    Monero (XMR):
bl33ding_heart

bl33ding_heart

Borderline
Jun 24, 2025
597
Chronic pain has been ruining my life this past month. I had a weird incident where my back was hurting so bad and clenching itself to the point I could barely move, and had to get taken to a hospital. At the hospital they didn't even run any sort of tests and just sent me home with painkillers. I've been in pain everyday since then and it's making my life so difficult. This is seriously a pain in the ass to deal with on top of my bpd and depression. I don't know why god has to curse me with another burden on top of my debilitating already existing problems. But I seriously wish this issue could just disappear. I try to be productive and study and get things done but the pain is so bad I physically can't, and I just end up wasting my time. My exams are in a month and I am already quite behind. This is just setting me back even more and I don't know if I have faith in myself to do well in my exams anymore. I can't get them postponed, and my whole future is dependant on them. If I score poorly I'm seriously better off just killing myself.
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: suncide10, Soumatou, Kanau_Nano and 5 others
Matchaaa

Matchaaa

pragmatics errors can kill me
Dec 10, 2025
352
I hope your chronic pain gets better soon. I'm sorry you're going through this. I know chronic pain and mental health issues can make life feel unbearable sometimes.🫂
You don't deserve any of this. I really hope things get better for you.
 
  • Love
  • Hugs
Reactions: Kanau_Nano, wine is fine but and bl33ding_heart
W

wine is fine but

whiskey's quicker
Jul 26, 2025
349
is it muscular?
if it was clenching or spasming, it most probably is

if it is muscular, the hospital probably could not have done anything anyway
if you can go and see a physiotherapist, but also try some very gentle walking - a hot shower directly onto it can also help

one of the best things for a sore back (if it is lower back) is walking. you can start feeling some results very quickly
 
  • Love
Reactions: Kanau_Nano and bl33ding_heart
certified_idiot

certified_idiot

Future Lost Media
Dec 5, 2023
127
How long has this been happening? If it's just been this past month, there's a chance it could go away. Like someone else in this thread said, it sounds like a muscular problem, which would be something to see a physiotherapist about. As someone who's had treatment-resistant chronic pain for years, you want to get help as soon as possible. Don't give up when there could still be a solution. Be loud, be annoying, be impossible to ignore, fight for the help you need. The medical system is shit (at least where I live), but don't let that discourage you from getting help. Fight them until the bitter end.
 
  • Love
Reactions: bl33ding_heart and Kanau_Nano
Raindancer

Raindancer

Specialist
Nov 4, 2023
373
I am sorry you are suffering. Could you try massage. I personally have had some good results with massage. Just make sure you go to someone who really knows what they are doing. Chronic pain that doesn't go away completely drains you and unless someone has been through it, they just do not understand. I hope you can find the reason behind it and get some relief.💜
 
  • Love
Reactions: bl33ding_heart
LilGhost

LilGhost

Shark
Apr 8, 2026
70
Chronic pain has been ruining my life this past month. I had a weird incident where my back was hurting so bad and clenching itself to the point I could barely move, and had to get taken to a hospital. At the hospital they didn't even run any sort of tests and just sent me home with painkillers. I've been in pain everyday since then and it's making my life so difficult. This is seriously a pain in the ass to deal with on top of my bpd and depression. I don't know why god has to curse me with another burden on top of my debilitating already existing problems. But I seriously wish this issue could just disappear. I try to be productive and study and get things done but the pain is so bad I physically can't, and I just end up wasting my time. My exams are in a month and I am already quite behind. This is just setting me back even more and I don't know if I have faith in myself to do well in my exams anymore. I can't get them postponed, and my whole future is dependant on them. If I score poorly I'm seriously better off just killing myself.
Damn. I am sorry you have to go through this. Mental pain and physical pain together is fr not fair

Where pain located? I am no medical professional, but might recognize this. My first thought was Ehler-Danlos or hypermobility. I had mine worsened and more pain appear in my back because my muscles became to fatigued.
Picture+1.jpg

you need at least 4 points I think, to get diagnosed. Thats smth you can test yourself before going to doctor for diagnosis (then ask for physiotherapist referral, they can help you with what exercsies and mobile aids can work best for you and etc).
If its not it, I can advise you to get X-ray of your spine and lower back (for that, just go to your family doctor and ask for the X-ray)
P.S. Hypermobility wouldnt be shown on normal spine x-ray so that test is needed


What can you do for now: K-tap with menthol (i tape my knees but you should be able to do so with the back too) and tylenol percise pain relieving cream (or advil/whatever is available nearby). Both of them (at least in Canada) are widely available so it should be easy to acquire
Also, I can suggest you to ask your doctor for painkillers if you didnt yet. If anything above didnt work, you can ask to perscribe smth like duloxetine (I cant pick up from pharmacy it yet, so cant give you my review on it, but I heard it could work)

Anyway.... Thats just me and what I suggest, I am sorry if nothing seemed useful from above or you already did it. I very hope you'll survive this shit. Also, good luck on the exams, saw your posts from before and you really seem like a cool and good person, so im being sincere when I wish you well ^^
 
  • Love
  • Informative
Reactions: bl33ding_heart and 8hsjyd
bl33ding_heart

bl33ding_heart

Borderline
Jun 24, 2025
597
Damn. I am sorry you have to go through this. Mental pain and physical pain together is fr not fair

Where pain located? I am no medical professional, but might recognize this. My first thought was Ehler-Danlos or hypermobility. I had mine worsened and more pain appear in my back because my muscles became to fatigued.
Picture+1.jpg

you need at least 4 points I think, to get diagnosed. Thats smth you can test yourself before going to doctor for diagnosis (then ask for physiotherapist referral, they can help you with what exercsies and mobile aids can work best for you and etc).
If its not it, I can advise you to get X-ray of your spine and lower back (for that, just go to your family doctor and ask for the X-ray)
P.S. Hypermobility wouldnt be shown on normal spine x-ray so that test is needed


What can you do for now: K-tap with menthol (i tape my knees but you should be able to do so with the back too) and tylenol percise pain relieving cream (or advil/whatever is available nearby). Both of them (at least in Canada) are widely available so it should be easy to acquire
Also, I can suggest you to ask your doctor for painkillers if you didnt yet. If anything above didnt work, you can ask to perscribe smth like duloxetine (I cant pick up from pharmacy it yet, so cant give you my review on it, but I heard it could work)

Anyway.... Thats just me and what I suggest, I am sorry if nothing seemed useful from above or you already did it. I very hope you'll survive this shit. Also, good luck on the exams, saw your posts from before and you really seem like a cool and good person, so im being sincere when I wish you well ^^
Thank you so much for even bothering to type this all out for me. Your advice is much appreciated. 💕
 
T

taker_of_insulin

Member
Aug 22, 2025
97
I feel you. I've been suffering from acute gastritis for the past 3 months and it's ruined my life. I can no longer go to work. I wake up vomiting and in pain everyday. I'm nauseous 24/7. I truly want to die because of it
 
  • Love
Reactions: bl33ding_heart
bl33ding_heart

bl33ding_heart

Borderline
Jun 24, 2025
597
I feel you. I've been suffering from acute gastritis for the past 3 months and it's ruined my life. I can no longer go to work. I wake up vomiting and in pain everyday. I'm nauseous 24/7. I truly want to die because of it
That sounds horrible, I'm so sorry. 🫂❤️
 

Similar threads

Kikorama
Replies
0
Views
145
Suicide Discussion
Kikorama
Kikorama
FloatingJellyfish
Replies
7
Views
311
Suicide Discussion
urgent
U
bl33ding_heart
Replies
8
Views
331
Suicide Discussion
SASU-KE
SASU-KE
J
Replies
1
Views
146
Suicide Discussion
Phobia_DLW
P