It’s going to happen!!!

[SoonToBeSoil]

Sorry for the meaningless post. I am just so excited to finally have a plan and for it to be so soon!!! It is now under 6 hours. (If that one fails, I have 5 more opportunities this morning.)

I am going to be dead!!!! This is all I have ever wished for.

Right now I am just reading to pass the time and checking my phone occasionally between chapters. I don't really care for this book but it is helping me pass the time.

My family is going to hateee me (I don't care).
(2nd post)
I am smiling so much. I have been in such a good mood all day. They don't know it's because I'm going to be dead soon. I have been listening to Suicider by Kennyoung on loop for hours. (I found it from this forum! someone shared it somewhere)

 

[aego]

if this is what you really want, I hope it's comfortable as possible for you— I hope everything goes how you want it to

 

[EternalShore]

See ya SoonToBeSoil~ It is nice to here that you are happy~ :) Please enjoy the book and whatever else you wish to use to pass the time~ I wish you the best and will pray for you~ :)

 

[pk@2001]

Hope you will found the peace and happiness which you dearly deserve

 

[Malfunction]

May you find your peace.

If you decide today isn't your day, we will be here.

Good luck

 

[FF777]

i just had a thought.... you said there are multiple trains passing in the day....... well first of all i want to echo what Malfunction up there said: if you get cold feet for what ever reason then there is no reason you can't wait a few more days or how ever long you want to wait....... but any way... here is what i was thinking: since there are multiple trains passing, you might try just skipping the first one and just seeing it pass by, just so you get a feel of what it will look like, sound like, and feel like.. it will give you a chance to see the timing, and how loud it is, and how real and scary it might be.. and then you can use that data to mentally prepare and tweak or alter any thing in the plan you need to..

and if you start getting too sleepy but don't want to lose the sleepiness level you have attained, then you can take a short nap like 30-60 minutes, but make sure you set an alarm and force your self to wake back up, or else you will end up sleeping a long time..

but any way, just to reiterate: don't CTB unless you are absolutely sure you are ready.. you can always do it later if you need to and it will be perfectly fine..

love and light..

 

[darksouls]

see you on the other side, my friend

 

[thruDeathPeace]

Finally. The power. Back in your own hands.

Something happened to me. Maybe a month ago. Or two. I looked up at the night sky and was surrounded by the most amazing sight. Moths. Flittering out. left. Right. All over the sky. And it was the first time I felt joy at the idea of ending it all. Those poor creatures. dying as they were, trying to circle a light that would never lead them to peace but so they continued anyway. rest in peace or pieces. may we all. good night.

 

[ireallywasnttogopls]

hope you find peace

 

[Shrub]

I hope everything goes well for you. What book are you reading, if you don't mind me asking?

 

[Malfunction]

here is what i was thinking: since there are multiple trains passing, you might try just skipping the first one and just seeing it pass by, just so you get a feel of what it will look like, sound like, and feel like.. it will give you a chance to see the timing, and how loud it is, and how real and scary it might be.. and then you can use that data to mentally prepare and tweak or alter any thing in the plan you need to..

This is something I wouldn't have thought of, and great advice.

Trains are quite loud, and it could easily shoot a person's anxiety up.

When I was a kid, I used to sit under a bridge that trains passed under. I did it for the rush. They came in fast and loud and the echo from the bridge just amplified it. I'm used to it, but I remember how startling it was the first time.

Another thing that comes to mind is that if you put your ear on a track, you'll sense the vibration well in advance. That could freak a person out a bit if laying on the tracks was the plan.

I'm in full agreement, watch a few trains go by to get a feel for it. It's not the same as watching a train go by from a vehicle. They are much louder and vibrate the ground when you're next to one.

 

[SoonToBeSoil]

I hope everything goes well for you. What book are you reading, if you don't mind me asking?

The fault in our stars (not a bad book, but I wanted to read war and peace next, which I don't have)

 

[Shrub]

The fault in our stars (not a bad book, but I wanted to read war and peace next, which I don't have)

Never heard of War and Peace, will check it out! If you have the time to, you might be able to find a PDF of it online, if you're still interested in reading it

 

[Braindead Girl]

I wish you all the best

 

[savemedanaplz]

Sorry for the meaningless post. I am just so excited to finally have a plan and for it to be so soon!!! It is now under 6 hours. (If that one fails, I have 5 more opportunities this morning.)

I am going to be dead!!!! This is all I have ever wished for.

Right now I am just reading to pass the time and checking my phone occasionally between chapters. I don't really care for this book but it is helping me pass the time.

My family is going to hateee me (I don't care).
(2nd post)
I am smiling so much. I have been in such a good mood all day. They don't know it's because I'm going to be dead soon. I have been listening to Suicider by Kennyoung on loop for hours. (I found it from this forum! someone shared it somewhere)

Same here! I've never been happier despite having all these problems that got me here. I'm gonna try tonight as well, i hope you find peace, stranger, I'll see you on the other side:)

 

[shibby]

hopefully u see this in the morning, but i hope it goes smoothly and peacefully! i wish u the best and love ya!

 

[Die.A.Ria]

Omg im so happy for you!!! I hope you get the peace you deserve :)
Whats your method?

 

[Dreaming Freedom]

Sorry for the meaningless post. I am just so excited to finally have a plan and for it to be so soon!!! It is now under 6 hours. (If that one fails, I have 5 more opportunities this morning.)

I am going to be dead!!!! This is all I have ever wished for.

Right now I am just reading to pass the time and checking my phone occasionally between chapters. I don't really care for this book but it is helping me pass the time.

My family is going to hateee me (I don't care).
(2nd post)
I am smiling so much. I have been in such a good mood all day. They don't know it's because I'm going to be dead soon. I have been listening to Suicider by Kennyoung on loop for hours. (I found it from this forum! someone shared it somewhere)

Happy to hear that you feel happy now.. i hope you can finally find peace and eternal happiness

 

[SoonToBeSoil]

Never heard of War and Peace, will check it out! If you have the time to, you might be able to find a PDF of it online, if you're still interested in reading it

I recommend Tolstoy's confessions and anna karenina

Omg im so happy for you!!! I hope you get the peace you deserve :)
Whats your method?

Train

 

[DeathSweetDeath]

Never heard of War and Peace, will check it out! If you have the time to, you might be able to find a PDF of it online, if you're still interested in reading it

Hmmmm. I haven't read it myself (but I watched the movie), but
War & Peace is one of the most famous books that was ever written.

 

[angel164]

I wish you find the peace you are looking for, wherever it is