I think pills will help you to overcome survival instinct

[Lost Magic]

Just a quick post here. Haven taken xanax, benzos and sleeping tablets, I really do think they would be helpful aids to help supress SI. Once I take them, I should have fewer problems drinking the Sodium Nitrite. I do think people should try and get a hold of at least something that will calm them down because don't underestimate the power of survival instinct. I am not breaking any ground here by emphasising this but it really would help to get some pills from a reliable source or from you doctor if you can.

 

[FTL.Wanderer]

try and get a hold of at least something that will calm them down because don't underestimate the power of survival instinct.

Agreed. Just don't know which ones and how to reliably get. I know, I know... Dark Web.

 

[phoenixx]

I won't be able to get ahold of these pills, so I'm planning on taking a lot of strong painkillers (w/ codeine) to get high and drink vodka. I do this a lot now and it spaces me right out so I'm hoping it will help with SI

 

[tryingtoescape]

Which pills help you the most?

 

[dyingalone123]

Totally agree If there were pills I'll go out quickly

 

[xLosthopex]

I take 15mg a day of valium, I need it for anxiety and insomnia, but ideally I think I should come off it before drinking my N but I'm still not sure if it's completely necessary ? Especially considering that I'm very underweight I'm kinda hoping it wouldn't really matter, as in the dose of N in relation to my body weight would be so much that my dependency on valium would have little impact? Anyone any thoughts on this ?
And then prior to taking N maybe I could just take a few pills at once to help with SI

 

[Lost Magic]

I take 15mg a day of valium, I need it for anxiety and insomnia, but ideally I think I should come off it before drinking my N but I'm still not sure if it's completely necessary ? Especially considering that I'm very underweight I'm kinda hoping it wouldn't really matter, as in the dose of N in relation to my body weight would be so much that my dependency on valium would have little impact? Anyone any thoughts on this ?
And then prior to taking N maybe I could just take a few pills at once to help with SI

Well I think taking a break from the pills for at least a few days would help because of the bodies ability to build up a tolerance to them. I don't take my pills anyway because I drink Kratom tea on the daily so it wouldn't really matter in my case. But if you are determined to take your usual 15mg a valium a day, you could always up the dose a bit on your cbt day.

 

[FTL.Wanderer]

I do this a lot now

Hope it's OK to ask.... 1) Where/how do you get your pills? & 2) Does it calm you down enough to move forward with otherwise scary things?

 

[phoenixx]

Hope it's OK to ask.... 1) Where/how do you get your pills? & 2) Does it calm you down enough to move forward with otherwise scary things?

Of course! The pills i often use are easily accessible to me and are otc, so you can go into any pharmacy and get them and even order them at online pharmacy's (you just need to answer a few questions). Each of these pills contains 12.8mg of codeine so I usually take at least 20 of these with a few shots of vodka. I'm sometimes able to get stronger painkillers (30mg codeine each) from family members so I'm able to take half the amount of pills (10) each time, which is easier to swallow!

The pills (combined with the vodka) definitely calms me. I cannot explain the feeling. I normally suffer with anxiety pretty badly and find it hard to talk to people, but when I have all this in my system I'm like a different person. All my fears are literally gone and it I just get so euphoric. I wish I could be high every single day, but I'm unable to do that so it's usually every few weeks, sometimes I'm able to do it more. But in a way, having this break is good because it gives chance for my tolerance levels to go back down and it gives me something to look forward to. I've been doing this for quite a few years now, a lot of the overdoses has made me really ill which results in my breathing being affected and throwing up the whole day etc. Last year, I collapsed, fell hard to the ground and almost hit my head on the hard floor (this guy saw I was about to fall and ran over and caught my head in time). That's never happened before so I don't know why I collapsed that time. But being ill doesn't bother me, as long as I get the high first.

I'm sorry for writing so much! But I hope it answers your questions :)

 

[slyna]

Of course! The pills i often use are easily accessible to me and are otc, so you can go into any pharmacy and get them and even order them at online pharmacy's (you just need to answer a few questions). Each of these pills contains 12.8mg of codeine so I usually take at least 20 of these with a few shots of vodka. I'm sometimes able to get stronger painkillers (30mg codeine each) from family members so I'm able to take half the amount of pills (10) each time, which is easier to swallow!

The pills (combined with the vodka) definitely calms me. I cannot explain the feeling. I normally suffer with anxiety pretty badly and find it hard to talk to people, but when I have all this in my system I'm like a different person. All my fears are literally gone and it I just get so euphoric. I wish I could be high every single day, but I'm unable to do that so it's usually every few weeks, sometimes I'm able to do it more. But in a way, having this break is good because it gives chance for my tolerance levels to go back down and it gives me something to look forward to. I've been doing this for quite a few years now, a lot of the overdoses has made me really ill which results in my breathing being affected and throwing up the whole day etc. Last year, I collapsed, fell hard to the ground and almost hit my head on the hard floor (this guy saw I was about to fall and ran over and caught my head in time). That's never happened before so I don't know why I collapsed that time. But being ill doesn't bother me, as long as I get the high first.

I'm sorry for writing so much! But I hope it answers your questions :)

Name of pills?
Otc? U live in a 3rd world country?

 

[phoenixx]

Name of pills?
Otc? U live in a 3rd world country?

No I don't haha, the pills here are called Nurofen Plus. I actually managed to get a box today!

 

[FTL.Wanderer]

I'm sorry for writing so much! But I hope it answers your questions :)

Please don't apologize for sharing. This was very helpful to me. I wonder if your regimen would make advancing on to something far more potent (like Nembutal) MUCH easier. My fear over N is the time between taking it and dying. I don't want to be in any fashion conscious. I don't want to be anxious, frightened. I don't want to start having any kind of dreams as I fall dead. I just want to be gone--just like that. Thanks to what you've shared, I at least have one option if N has to be the way.

If you ever want to share more, please IM me. Wish you the best.

 

[phoenixx]

Please don't apologize for sharing. This was very helpful to me. I wonder if your regimen would make advancing on to something far more potent (like Nembutal) MUCH easier. My fear over N is the time between taking it and dying. I don't want to be in any fashion conscious. I don't want to be anxious, frightened. I don't want to start having any kind of dreams as I fall dead. I just want to be gone--just like that. Thanks to what you've shared, I at least have one option if N has to be the way.

If you ever want to share more, please IM me. Wish you the best.

I'm glad that it was helpful to you! I have don't know much about N but it could be an option. I'm definitely going to use painkillers and alcohol before partial hanging, I'm pretty sure it will help with the SI and take a lot of the fear away. I've tried partial hanging before, but the SI and that bit of fear has prevented me from being successful so hopefully when I try with painkillers and alcohol in my system, it will be a lot easier and I'll be successful. When you mentioned about the time from taking N to actually dying, I understand that. I think if I had decided to go with N, I would also be worried about the waiting you know? I really don't know how I would feel in that moment. That's why I decided that I would actually go with partial, and take the pills/alcohol beforehand. When you take these pills with alcohol, they kick in rather quickly. So if I take them not long before, I should be out of it enough to be able to put the noose around my neck and go unconscious before the fear and SI kick in. But I'll be sure not to drink too much, I don't want to mess up. Just enough. Tomorrow, I'm going to take some pills with vodka and I'll time it to see exactly how long it takes to kick in full effect and see exactly how I feel during that time. I'll take notes, it might be helpful on the day.

Thank you too, I hope you're able to figure something out. It can take time to find the right method, a method that works for you. Feel free to message me if you want to know anything else!

 

[NearlyIrrelevantCake]

One of the medications I'm on, Seroquel, knocks me the fuck out for 10-12 hours at a time. It's easily used/abused to sleep your way through life. I'll definitely be making use of it when I eventually CTB, it will be useful for avoiding SI.

 

[tryingtoescape]

One of the medications I'm on, Seroquel, knocks me the fuck out for 10-12 hours at a time. It's easily used/abused to sleep your way through life. I'll definitely be making use of it when I eventually CTB, it will be useful for avoiding SI.

Seroquel inhibits your Si? This is good to know. I've been trying to find information on drugs that eliminate Si (benzos are obviously the main, but I already take those frequently and have a tolerance.) I know Seroquel can slow down racing thoughts and cause drowsiness, but I didn't notice a significant reduction in Si. I'll try to pay more attention next time I next one.

 

[NearlyIrrelevantCake]

Seroquel inhibits your Si? This is good to know. I've been trying to find information on drugs that eliminate Si (benzos are obviously the main, but I already take those frequently and have a tolerance.) I know Seroquel can slow down racing thoughts and cause drowsiness, but I didn't notice a significant reduction in Si. I'll try to pay more attention next time I next one.

Well, it makes me unconscious. Can't have SI when you're not awake/conscious.

 

[tryingtoescape]

Well, it makes me unconscious. Can't have SI when you're not awake/conscious.

That's true, can't have Si when you're unconscious. But I'm deciding between 2 methods. SN and jumping. If I jump, I'd have to find some things to help me eliminate Si while I'm standing on the ledge.

 

[augustwest]

I agree does anyone know how to get benzos?

 

[fox_wannabe]

Will vodka help to overcome si? I do not have pills

 

[phoenixx]

Will vodka help to overcome si? I do not have pills

I think vodka can help, you could try drinking some one night, see how it effects you

 

[sadbadpsychogirl]

I won't be able to get ahold of these pills, so I'm planning on taking a lot of strong painkillers (w/ codeine) to get high and drink vodka. I do this a lot now and it spaces me right out so I'm hoping it will help with SI

codeine is a very weak painkiller. try to get something stronger

 

[snxw]

would codeine work?

 

[FTL.Wanderer]

I've tried partial hanging before, but the SI and that bit of fear has prevented me from being successful so hopefully when I try with painkillers and alcohol in my system, it will be a lot easier and I'll be successful. When you mentioned about the time from taking N to actually dying, I understand that. I think if I had decided to go with N, I would also be worried about the waiting you know? I really don't know how I would feel in that moment.

Exactly! I know a lot of other people aren't bothered by that time. They say it's very short, or that it's nothing compared to the pain they've already endured... Or they have faith there won't be any pain or fear. But, like you, I don't want want MORE pain at the end. Just to be gone--instantly. Please share more if/when you want.

One of the medications I'm on, Seroquel, knocks me the fuck out for 10-12 hours at a time. It's easily used/abused to sleep your way through life. I'll definitely be making use of it when I eventually CTB, it will be useful for avoiding SI.

Could you share a bit about how long it takes to kick in and what you feel like between taking it and when it kicks in? Thanks--no problem if you'd rather not go into details.