Venting I constantly feel as if I'm not good enough

[Gaga786]

My parents compared me a lot with my cousins, since I was young. I was constantly told that to look up-to my cousins who were doing exceptionally well In life. I constantly feel like im worthless, and a disappointment. My cousins are doing so well in life- have amazing grades, and are confident in their abilities. I've always felt as if my father was angry over how his son turned out, as if he wishes that his children could have been smart like others. My cousin started a business and became a millionaire overnight.His business was even used as an example by Harvard University, and my father is exceptionally proud of him. He constantly brags about him- how lucky we are to be his relative- but this hurts me deep down knowing that I'm just this pathetic worthless loser who can't do anything. After all, only the strong make it through life, and Im not strong enough :(.But, at the same time, it wasn't my fault that my father neglected me and refused to help me with my studies, whereas, my cousins parents provided their children with a strong, traumatic free upbringing with loads of help with studies. How is it fair ?

 

[Capsaicin78]

This is not your fault man. Parents should NEVER compare you to other people. It just makes you unhappy, you are not a loser for this. It's their fault for abondoning you emotianally

 

[Gaga786]

This is not your fault man. Parents should NEVER compare you to other people. It just makes you unhappy, you are not a loser for this. It's their fault for abondoning you emotianally

It is my fault indeed, I have disappointed them in every way. He worked hard to build a business and here I am just wasting my time, I can't do anything properly. I just wish I was a better person, I wish I could do something and make them proud. The best thing is to just leave so there lives can improve. Everyone in my outer family thinks of me as a failure and they all think how both of my father sons are nuisances and can't do anything properly. I just hope they realise that its really hard for me to live like this.

 

[FuneralCry]

There is nothing fair about life at all. In this life, many people are disadvantaged through no fault of their own. Life is very cruel and depressing, it is sad how much suffering exists and I'm sorry that you are in this situation. I know that it is hard to carry on when things seem so hopeless. I wish you the best in whatever happens.

 

[Capsaicin78]

Even if it was your fault, you said it yourself : "I just hope they realise that its really hard for me to live like this." . What they are doing to you is emotional terrorism, pls dont hate yourself for that.