"Wait... Survival Instinct, What Are You Doing Here?"

[Nigh]

I nearly died today... (I won't say how) but my survival instinct pulled me out. This is not a declaration that I want to live, I DON'T. But I couldn't remain calm and ended up getting myself out of a situation I wanted. I wonder if there's any exercises that can be done to minimise SI, it's so infuriating.

 

[VicMackey]

I nearly died today... (I won't say how) but my survival instinct pulled me out. This is not a declaration that I want to live, I DON'T. But I couldn't remain calm and ended up getting myself out of a situation I wanted. I wonder if there's any exercises that can be done to minimise SI, it's so infuriating.

This is what worked for me when i attempted.
Approximately 8 days of no human contact. No phone, text, emails, no radio, television. No social media, no sex.
I communicated with no one.
I did watch videos of hurt / disabled animals being rescued and brought back to a healthy life, in an effort to increase.my sadness.
I minimized food and water intake. I consumed whiskey. I isolated myself. No outside world contact. All of my regrets, fears, anxiety and insecurity closed in on me. I stayed out of the sun light. I barely got out of bed.
I completed the required SN routine documented on this forum. Unfortunately all i got was a headache and stomach ache. It didnt work. Im in the US and my SN was pure and correct grade
Very disappointed.

 

[Boochky]

This is what worked for me when i attempted.
Approximately 8 days of no human contact. No phone, text, emails, no radio, television. No social media, no sex.
I communicated with no one.
I did watch videos of hurt / disabled animals being rescued and brought back to a healthy life, in an effort to increase.my sadness.
I minimized food and water intake. I consumed whiskey. I isolated myself. No outside world contact. All of my regrets, fears, anxiety and insecurity closed in on me. I stayed out of the sun light. I barely got out of bed.
I completed the required SN routine documented on this forum. Unfortunately all i got was a headache and stomach ache. It didnt work. Im in the US and my SN was pure and correct grade
Very disappointed.

I didn't know whether to horror face react or hug react but I opted for the hug.

Poor thing.

Nobody can say you didn't give it your all, though, that's for sure.

The ingenuity of your strategy and thinking about how it must have felt for you. I don't know, but it makes me really sad that you want to die because it's kinda remarkable that you'd put yourself through that.

I hope things look up for you.

OP, I have never gotten as far as you probably but I would always be really relieved when I postponed and the truth is that I probably blew my best window so I do understand how it creeps in.

 

[Nigh]

Ù

This is what worked for me when i attempted.
Approximately 8 days of no human contact. No phone, text, emails, no radio, television. No social media, no sex.
I communicated with no one.
I did watch videos of hurt / disabled animals being rescued and brought back to a healthy life, in an effort to increase.my sadness.
I minimized food and water intake. I consumed whiskey. I isolated myself. No outside world contact. All of my regrets, fears, anxiety and insecurity closed in on me. I stayed out of the sun light. I barely got out of bed.
I completed the required SN routine documented on this forum. Unfortunately all i got was a headache and stomach ache. It didnt work. Im in the US and my SN was pure and correct grade
Very disappointed.

Thank you for taking the time to write suggestions. I will definitely make a list of this x

I didn't know whether to horror face react or hug react but I opted for the hug.

Poor thing.

Nobody can say you didn't give it your all, though, that's for sure.

The ingenuity of your strategy and thinking about how it must have felt for you. I don't know, but it makes me really sad that you want to die because it's kinda remarkable that you'd put yourself through that.

I hope things look up for you.

OP, I have never gotten as far as you probably but I would always be really relieved when I postponed and the truth is that I probably blew my best window so I do understand how it creeps in.

Thank you for kindness

 

[littlelungs]

I understand. It's so frustrating to be so close to finally getting the peace you crave so badly, only for survival instinct to kick in when you're right on the edge. I would be long gone if it wasn't for SI. Just for me personally, I've noticed that it goes down significantly when I've been drinking, so I'll most likely need to have some alcohol before I get the hell out of this prison cell that is my body.

Survival instinct is a great thing if you actually want to live... but a HUGE barrier and thus a complete and utter pain in the ass if you don't.

Hugs.

 

[Nigh]

I understand. It's so frustrating to be so close to finally getting the peace you crave so badly, only for survival instinct to kick in when you're right on the edge. I would be long gone if it wasn't for SI. Just for me personally, I've noticed that it goes down significantly when I've been drinking, so I'll most likely need to have some alcohol before I get the hell out of this prison cell that is my body.

Survival instinct is a great thing if you actually want to live... but a HUGE barrier and thus a complete and utter pain in the ass if you don't.

Hugs.

Thank you. Yes, I wish alcohol could work dor me like it works for some others, in terms of giving confidence, but it just makes me more anxious

 

[Carrotcake]

I've seen extensive posts here on SS (sorry I have no links ready for you) on overcoming SI. I think the basic principle is that you have to condition your brain into "accepting" your method and death is "normal".

One interesting thing about humans is that we can adapt to nearly anything. If you are exposed to something enough, you will pass a threshold and it becomes normal without having a panic response.

For some that's a few attempts, for others self harm, watching video's of people dying, etc.

 

[Freakazette]

This is what worked for me when i attempted.
Approximately 8 days of no human contact. No phone, text, emails, no radio, television. No social media, no sex.
I communicated with no one.
I did watch videos of hurt / disabled animals being rescued and brought back to a healthy life, in an effort to increase.my sadness.
I minimized food and water intake. I consumed whiskey. I isolated myself. No outside world contact. All of my regrets, fears, anxiety and insecurity closed in on me. I stayed out of the sun light. I barely got out of bed.
I completed the required SN routine documented on this forum. Unfortunately all i got was a headache and stomach ache. It didnt work. Im in the US and my SN was pure and correct grade
Very disappointed.

So, your SN was PURE and you didn't die? And a few effects? A headache and stomach ache? I don't understand why... Did you fast for at least 8 hours?

I don't want the same to happen to me... To wake up:|

It didn't absorb AT ALL?

This is the surviving instinct acting on his own not letting SN kill you? In your case, it didn't even make you awful sick...

I'm confused and I don't want to jump of a 10th floor building if I wake up...

I was counting on SN... I was scared of the effects and this FACT: not dying. This was the whole point...

Hugs,

@VicMackey

.

<b>Later update </b>: And how many grams did you take? And what is your weight?

Besides fasting... Any meds?

.

 

[Luna88]

The same thing happened to me. I hope xanax helps me suppress the survival instinct. I do not know what to do. I just can't do it. I want it so much. That's why I'm looking for a partner and hope that something will be easier. I hate life for it.

 

[VicMackey]

So, your SN was PURE and you didn't die? And a few effects? A headache and stomach ache? I don't understand why... Did you fast for at least 8 hours?

I don't want the same to happen to me... To wake up:|

It didn't absorb AT ALL?

This is the surviving instinct acting on his own not letting SN kill you? In your case, it didn't even make you awful sick...

I'm confused and I don't want to jump of a 10th floor building if I wake up...

I was counting on SN... I was scared of the effects and this FACT: not dying. This was the whole point...

Hugs,

@VicMackey

.

<b>Later update </b>: And how many grams did you take? And what is your weight?

Besides fasting... Any meds?

.

Im 50 years old and in very good health.
6'4" and 215 lbs
I live in the US and got one local source here and one from the jungle. I used 20 grams from each for redundancy.
Some accelerated heart rate, some dizziness. Upset stomach but no vomiting. About 20 mins after the first dose i did the 2nd dose. I fasted for 16 hours and had no other meds.
After 2nd dose i felt anxious but then that went away quickly.
Im guessing i passed out after 30 to 35 minutes.
I did this in my car during the day at a huge parking lot.
I woke up a little over 8 hours later with an upset stomach, headache, and i needed the bathroom bad and just made it.
My fingernails and lips were blue. It felt like i was walking through mud.
I went to bed for about 10 hours and woke up fine.
Very disappointing.

 

[Freakazette]

Im 50 years old and in very good health.
6'4" and 215 lbs
I live in the US and got one local source here and one from the jungle. I used 20 grams from each for redundancy.
Some accelerated heart rate, some dizziness. Upset stomach but no vomiting. About 20 mins after the first dose i did the 2nd dose. I fasted for 16 hours and had no other meds.
After 2nd dose i felt anxious but then that went away quickly.
Im guessing i passed out after 30 to 35 minutes.
I did this in my car during the day at a huge parking lot.
I woke up a little over 8 hours later with an upset stomach, headache, and i needed the bathroom bad and just made it.
My fingernails and lips were blue. It felt like i was walking through mud.
I went to bed for about 10 hours and woke up fine.
Very disappointing.

If I wake up...

Thank you a lot for your answer!

And you even had two SNs from two different sources...

Was your body that tough maybe? Or perhaps one of the SN was not that pure...

Conclusion: everyone's body reacts differently...

Hopefully, I will not wake up :(

,

 

[VicMackey]

If I wake up...

Thank you a lot for your answer!

And you even had two SNs from two different sources...

Was your body that tough maybe? Or perhaps one of the SN was not that pure...

Conclusion: everyone's body reacts differently...

Hopefully, I will not wake up :(

,

Im starting to doubt the effectiveness of this method.

 

[FuneralCry]

It is really hard to take our lives. We may want to die but us humans are programmed to live. I hope that for me someday I reach the point of desperation where I am able to overcome it. I wish you well.

 

[archipelago]

Im 50 years old and in very good health.
6'4" and 215 lbs
I live in the US and got one local source here and one from the jungle. I used 20 grams from each for redundancy.
Some accelerated heart rate, some dizziness. Upset stomach but no vomiting. About 20 mins after the first dose i did the 2nd dose. I fasted for 16 hours and had no other meds.
After 2nd dose i felt anxious but then that went away quickly.
Im guessing i passed out after 30 to 35 minutes.
I did this in my car during the day at a huge parking lot.
I woke up a little over 8 hours later with an upset stomach, headache, and i needed the bathroom bad and just made it.
My fingernails and lips were blue. It felt like i was walking through mud.
I went to bed for about 10 hours and woke up fine.
Very disappointing.

This is horrifying… so you took 40 g per drink and nothing? Fuck I feel really trapped now and I need to get out of here ASAP

 

[Freakazette]

This is horrifying… so you took 40 g per drink and nothing? Fuck I feel really trapped now and I need to get out of here ASAP

Maybe he was too healthy?

And 40 g weren't enough?

It's like he actual SLEPT over it...


and: FINE in the end. Like what?

 

[archipelago]

I've read in the new PPeH from March that weight is a consideration too, that if you're at 100 kg you need to take 35 g I think it was… but if he took 40 and still nothing… holy shit I'm so scared now

 

[Freakazette]

I'd read in the new PPeH from March that weight is a consideration too, that if you're at 100 kg you need to take 35 g I think it was… but if he took 40 and still nothing… holy shit I'm so scared now

I don't have any clue...

But I'm waaay under 60 kilos, so... I mean he said he was around 100 kilos and a healthy individual, he also slept a lot.

Maybe his healthy organism managed to get rid of the effects of SN somehow, through sleep also. And no vomitting. He didn't even puke nothing out...

What the actual f**k?

.

 

[VicMackey]

This is horrifying… so you took 40 g per drink and nothing? Fuck I feel really trapped now and I need to get out of here ASAP

40 grams total. 20 grams from each brand. Im wondering if SN is really another internet hoax. I think we are missing an ingredient.

 

[archipelago]

I'd get how it didn't work if you took 20 g per drink and vomited, but if there was no vomiting I'm shocked

fuck fuck fuck

 

[Freakazette]

I'd get how it didn't work if you took 20 g per drink and vomited, but if there was no vomiting I'm shocked

fuck fuck fuck

He said hoax... Missing ingredient...

Something's OFF with his whole story then.

Maybe the missing ingredient is within himself.

He might be someone who's trying to scare us from taking SN. ( even a cop/doctor... or a pro lifer )

Or simply there is an explanation but we don't know it. Too many factors. Quality of SN, organism and such.

Maybe his mind and sleeping process is THAT curing, has 'healing' ability. "God" didn't take him, right. Am joking... There's always an explanation.

,

 

[Astral316]

In his first post he said all he had was a headache and stomach ache.... second post he said he managed to pass out. First post he said he was in bed... second post he said he was in a parking lot. He's certain his SN was pure grade. Why? It's natural to question the purity of one's SN if it doesn't work, unless he wants to invalidate the method overall. In short...I call bullshit. SN is backed by science. If the poisoning doesn't kill you you did it wrong.

 

[VicMackey]

In his first post he said all he had was a headache and stomach ache.... second post he said he managed to pass out. First post he said he was in bed... second post he said he was in a parking lot. He's certain his SN was pure grade. Why? It's natural to question the purity of one's SN if it doesn't work, unless he wants to invalidate the method overall. In short...I call bullshit. SN is backed by science. If the poisoning doesn't kill you you did it wrong.

I assure you, no hoax here. Iam a recently retired cop though, fyi.
I provided the information and my experience and my opinion. If you dont like it or dont agree, thats fine, but dont insinuate that im a liar or an idiot please and thank you.

 

[Bullit]

Im 50 years old and in very good health.
6'4" and 215 lbs
I live in the US and got one local source here and one from the jungle. I used 20 grams from each for redundancy.
Some accelerated heart rate, some dizziness. Upset stomach but no vomiting. About 20 mins after the first dose i did the 2nd dose. I fasted for 16 hours and had no other meds.
After 2nd dose i felt anxious but then that went away quickly.
Im guessing i passed out after 30 to 35 minutes.
I did this in my car during the day at a huge parking lot.
I woke up a little over 8 hours later with an upset stomach, headache, and i needed the bathroom bad and just made it.
My fingernails and lips were blue. It felt like i was walking through mud.
I went to bed for about 10 hours and woke up fine.
Very disappointing.

Are you going to try this again? I wonder if you got some inferior brand of SN?

 

[archipelago]

In his first post he said all he had was a headache and stomach ache.... second post he said he managed to pass out. First post he said he was in bed... second post he said he was in a parking lot. He's certain his SN was pure grade. Why? It's natural to question the purity of one's SN if it doesn't work, unless he wants to invalidate the method overall. In short...I call bullshit. SN is backed by science. If the poisoning doesn't kill you you did it wrong.

Thanks for this, seriously. I've never attempted bc I always knew it could easily make my situation worse if I failed, so I know I need to get it done the first time and it's scary having so much riding on it.

 

[VicMackey]

Are you going to try this again? I wonder if you got some inferior brand of SN?

I have no doubts about the quality of both SN products i purchased. My next option is firearm.