Thinking of the future makes me suicidal

[wasteofspace22]

I just think about how we are all gonna die one day, or my parents not being here anymore, especially makes me suicidal. Thinking of relapsing on drugs in the future also makes me suicidal. Just so many things in general do. I hate how life is just filled with endless possibilities for things to go wrong

 

[Deleted member 31858]

I understand you, imagining the future is one of the worst things, there are so many possibilities and so many things that can get worse, my mind never rests thinking about all that and nothing helps to turn off my thoughts.

 

[ProChoiExistential]

I can relate to your post a lot. I get severe anxiety thinking of the possibilities that could happen now or farther in the future. The past also causes me to become distraught The drugs thing, potential health problems, negative social interactions, finance, losing my job, etc.

 

[WhatPowerIs]

Losing my parents would be awful, I completely see where you're coming from. I also try envisioning my own future, one where I grow old, and I am having a seriously hard time trying to imagine it. I guess maybe in this reality I am not supposed to live this long?

 

[Astral Storm]

I am terrified to lose my parents too. They are not really understanding but they love me. I don't want to live but I don't want to hurt them either. I don't plan to live long though as it would be a horror show. I am already tired and all of this seems like an impossible and hopeless situation.

 

[foreverfalling]

Quite a few posts here mentioning parents. Yeah my parents were neglectful and made me who I am, but they're the only people who will stick around and look after me. If they're gone then there's no more reason to stay in this world and to put up with all the shit.

 

[FrozenMango]

I get it. My feeling about things going wrong changed from anxiety to apathy. I am ready to pull the trigger when things become unbearable

 

[FuneralCry]

I find it comforting the fact that we will all die one day. Death is the end to all suffering. I think that those who have left this life behind are lucky, as to cease to exist is the best thing that could possibly happen. Our only purpose as humans is to die after all. I do have so much dread for the future as I know that things will just get worse.

If I don't ctb I could potentially have many decades left and that thought is so horrifying. There really are so many things that can go wrong in life and that's why I could never understand those who want to live in a world that's as cruel as this. Life is just endless problems and suffering, and only death could ever possibly bring relief.

 

[Ligottian]

The strongest emotion is fear. The strongest form of fear is fear of the unknown.
- H. P. Lovecraft

 

[wasteofspace22]

I find it comforting the fact that we will all die one day. Death is the end to all suffering. I think that those who have left this life behind are lucky, as to cease to exist is the best thing that could possibly happen. Our only purpose as humans is to die after all. I do have so much dread for the future as I know that things will just get worse.

If I don't ctb I could potentially have many decades left and that thought is so horrifying. There really are so many things that can go wrong in life and that's why I could never understand those who want to live in a world that's as cruel as this. Life is just endless problems and suffering, and only death could ever possibly bring relief.

For me it's scary, thinking that you only get one life so you better do it right and thinking of all the endless scenarios where stuff could've been done differently, what will happen, all this stuff yada yada

 

[takemenowpls]

I can relate to your post a lot. I get severe anxiety thinking of the possibilities that could happen now or farther in the future. The past also causes me to become distraught The drugs thing, potential health problems, negative social interactions, finance, losing my job, etc.

I've had most of what you list happen. Woke up this morning with extreme paranoia and anxiety. Life sucks to say the least but I am too scared to do anything about it

 

[wasteofspace22]

I've had most of what you list happen. Woke up this morning with extreme paranoia and anxiety. Life sucks to say the least but I am too scared to do anything about it

Me too, to be honest I doubt I'll ever have courage to CTB, especially at this point, if things get worse I could only see myself being impulsive, if I come up with a plan I only see myself chickening out

 

[takemenowpls]

Me too, to be honest I doubt I'll ever have courage to CTB, especially at this point, if things get worse I could only see myself being impulsive, if I come up with a plan I only see myself chickening out

My heart goes out to you. I really wish CBT was easier. Its really sad to be forced to simply exist.

 

[SiroccoSousse]

My number 1 reason for wanting to CTB is to leave this planet before it turns into an apocalyptic shithole. It sounds hyperbolic but looking at the impact climate change is already having it feels like less and less of an extreme opinion to have every day. I was just reading about how badly the Colorado river has dried up and how important it is for the food supply for the entire country; we've known about this problem for over 23 years and everyone who has the power to make a difference has chosen to ignore the problem and if that continues for much longer it'll be too late, if it's not already - and the science agrees. Nobody wants to do anything about it, everyone is too invested in their short-term comfort with no regard to the long-term consequences of their actions. I don't want to be stuck on the same planet with a majority population that isn't going to care about our collective future until it's too late. Truthfully I don't really even want to kill myself, my life has actually been very comfortable and enjoyable, but looking at how the future is shaping up to be I would really prefer to not be a part of it.