Plausible Deniability

[bananacrackers]

I've been contemplating ending my life for many years. I have struggled with depression for 20+ years and was recently diagnosed w/ borderline. All that holds me back at this stage is immense worry about the long term psychological damage to my children (teenagers). I have to get over this because I can't do this anymore. What methods might one consider if plausible deniability is a priority?

 

[SofterSoftest]

I've looked into this question endlessly. Sadly, there only seem to be two less than ideal options: (1) take N or SN deep in a forest or other secluded area with wildlife, and hope that your body has deteriorated too much (i.e., due to feeding by scavengers) to allow for an accurate autopsy before it is found, or (2) use nitrogen gas and ask someone to take the mask/equipment off before your body is found (nitrogen is supposed to be undetectable according to the PPeH).

Neither of these options is easy, and #2 is near impossible without implicating someone in a serious crime.

 

[Seeking_Peace]

If you have a best friend you trust with your life(who you trust with your darkest secrets). Consider Nitrogen and have them remove the equipment after death as Softer stated.

Police will rule it a natural cause death. Maybe you know a person/associate(not connected to your family) tight for money and a sketchy background who wouldn't mind assisting you.

 

[bananacrackers]

If you have a best friend you trust with your life(who you trust with your darkest secrets). Consider Nitrogen and have them remove the equipment after death as Softer stated.

Police will rule it a natural cause death. Maybe you know a person/associate(not connected to your family) tight for money and a sketchy background who wouldn't mind assisting you.

Naïve question … is there a forum others have used to find someone who would be open to doing this for money?

 

[friendofbirds]

that's the million dollar question. ive thought about getting in some kind of car accident so it doesnt look like suicide but there are so many factors in how that can go that are entirely out of your control. now youre in thousands of dollars in medical debt and possibly paralyzed and probably restricted license all for nothing lol

 

[Seeking_Peace]

Naïve question … is there a forum others have used to find someone who would be open to doing this for money?

Your best bet online is finding a partner & hoping they back out after you die & take the evidence. Otherwise, scour your neighborhood. You'd be surprised what people would do for money.

There is a partners thread on the main page. Check it out.

 

[veryhappyhuman]

take N or SN deep in a forest or other secluded area with wildlife,

Wouldn't that end up poisoning the environment? The toxins might even move up the food chain slowly and have aftereffects for decades. That's why I dropped this idea.

 

[Seeking_Peace]

Wouldn't that end up poisoning the environment? The toxins might even move up the food chain slowly and have aftereffects for decades. That's why I dropped this idea.

So you don't drink water bottles or drive a car? Everyone poisons the environment. If someone wants to go out peacefully and have the means they should.

 

[veryhappyhuman]

So you don't drink water bottles or drive a car? Everyone poisons the environment. If someone wants to go out peacefully and have the means they should.

This is a lot more specific and direct than "humans are destroying the environment" in a general sense. I'm by no means an environmentalist and not blindly against plastic or cars or whatever. This is literally poisoning creatures other than me by my own direct action. Maybe some don't care about it but I'd prefer not having that as my last act before I go.

Plus "going out peacefully" doesn't really require you to do this in a forest or other fragile ecosystem. It's not even good for OP's needs, bc soon after they locate the body, they will know that it was a death by suicide via poison. It'd just take slightly longer to identify that it's OP.

 

[Seeking_Peace]

This is a lot more specific and direct than "humans are destroying the environment" in a general sense. I'm by no means an environmentalist and not blindly against plastic or cars or whatever. This is literally poisoning creatures other than me by my own direct action. Maybe some don't care about it but I'd prefer not having that as my last act before I go.

Plus "going out peacefully" doesn't really require you to do this in a forest or other fragile ecosystem. It's not even good for OP's needs, bc soon after they locate the body, they will know that it was a death by suicide via poison. It'd just take slightly longer to identify that it's OP.

You're still participating in environmental destruction as I previously pointed out. A decomposing body with a small amount of SN or N does less damage than cars and plastics. We can agree to disagree.

 

[SofterSoftest]

Wouldn't that end up poisoning the environment? The toxins might even move up the food chain slowly and have aftereffects for decades. That's why I dropped this idea.

Yes, that's a really good point - thanks for mentioning that. N can't, to my knowledge, really poison anything in the environment because its main function is that of a sedative (as opposed to a poison, per se) and would be too diluted in the human body to affect anything consuming it after death, presumably. SN is absolutely a hazard and shouldn't be consumed in a fragile ecosystem (you're right) - even if the amount of ingested SN becomes too diffuse in the human body to affect scavengers, I would worry about any remaining SN getting into a natural water system, or the person ingesting the SN throwing it back up so that it pollutes the soil nearby.

 

[mondoCruel]

I've said it before, making a hanging look like an auto-erotic asphyxiation accident seems pretty easy, I'm pretty sure if the cops find a laptop in front of you playing porn and you are naked, they will rule it an accident

 

[Alex6216]

If you dont care about committing a crime. You could overdose on GHB, it's a drug used for nefarious purposes but people also use it to bring pleasure to themselves, if you take a bunch of xanax and drink alcohol that is laced with 10 or more grams of GHB it will kill you, it kills the same way as N so it's painless. If you die via GHB overdose the police would most likely suspect you werent planning on killing yourself but instead wanted to get high but the initial dosage wasnt high enough
The only problem is availability, price and the fact it is illegal if you're caught with it. There's this thing called "the darknet bible" which is a guide to buying drugs like GHB from the darknet, if you follow the guide the chances of being scammed or hacked or arrested is very slim

Wouldn't that end up poisoning the environment? The toxins might even move up the food chain slowly and have aftereffects for decades. That's why I dropped this idea.

N and SN don't have devastating effects on the environment, any animal that eats your corpse will be fine since the poison will eventually go away after a while. This isn't plastic or anything

 

[bananacrackers]

overdose on GHB, it's a drug used for nefarious purposes but people also use it to bring pleasure to themselves, if you take a bunch of xanax and drink alcohol that is laced with 10 or more grams of GHB it will kill you, it kills the same way as N so it's painless. If you die via GHB overdose the police would most likely suspect you werent planning on killing yourself

Is this a significantly surer method than Xanax + alcohol alone?

 

[Alex6216]

Is this a significantly surer method than Xanax + alcohol alone?

Yes because it's the GHB which kills you, the alcohol and xanax is only there to make it more lethal, you can use xanax + GHB and not use any alcohol, only water, and still die but you need a slightly higher dosage