My time is coming to an end

[itsoverforme303]

I am scared. I can't live on any more. But I'm too scared to die. I have no other option left but to kill myself. There is no escape and every person I have gone to help has kept putting up walls. I am tired. I just wish I could go to sleep and never wake up. I can't take this pain anymore. I just want to cry. I wish my heart would just stop. I can think of nothing but killing myself, and it fills me with dread and panic, just thinking about how painful those final moments would be. And what if I don't succeed? What happens then? I need to kill myself. I can't live on like this. I wish someone listened to me. They hear me but don't understand me. I'm not faking it, I am in so much pain. I can't take it anymore. I can't. I can't. Hopefully my parents get over it. I can't bear to think they'll be hurting forever. But I can't stay like this hurting forever as well. Maybe I will finally pray for the second time in my life. I have to be gone by the end of next month at most. I just need the strength to do it. Every second awake is torture.

 

[getoutgirl]

Hi I related a hell of a lot to all that you said, went through that early this morning even, so I'm sorry people around you only hear you but I can assure you people here do understand you. I get the very real pain, exhaustion, desperation and desire to sleep forever that still calls despite the fear and dread that come with it. It's fucking horrible and I'm sorry. We are here for you in whatever way we can make living through that a lil easier, hugs <3

 

[FuneralCry]

I really understand finding it so torturous and painful to exist, all I wish for is to never wake ever again, I just wish for no more pain and no more suffering and it's so cruel to me how there's all this suffering in existing, it sounds like you've suffered a lot. But anyway I wish you the best, I hope you find peace.

 

[notreallybored]

ב''ה,
Sounds about how things are.