I wasn't sure how to flair this post, since I am asking for help, but I'm also venting a bit, but here we go.
I need help with figuring out where a good place would be to try suicide by train around Ulster County NY. I've nearly reached the deadline I set many years ago for June 11, 2026. My plan for SN fell through, as I don't feel confident enough in a poison as a suicide method—especially without an antiemetic, as I didn't ask my prescriber for one due to fear of them suspecting me. I also couldn't find the materials for an "detergent death" on the internet for some reason, even though the PPH said that the materials were unregulated. Any other feasible methods would be appreciated except for jumping, as I am terrified of heights.
I'm really starting to worry that I won't be dead by tomorrow though. To make matters worse, my good friend canceled the plans I made with him for tomorrow. These plans either served as a goodbye If I managed to find a method, or as much needed comfort in case I make it past the deadline. Either way, he cancelled due to family obligations. I've been trying to get ahold of him to ask if I can still call him tomorrow, but no response so far.
I just want to die. I can't take much more of feeling like this.
I need help with figuring out where a good place would be to try suicide by train around Ulster County NY. I've nearly reached the deadline I set many years ago for June 11, 2026. My plan for SN fell through, as I don't feel confident enough in a poison as a suicide method—especially without an antiemetic, as I didn't ask my prescriber for one due to fear of them suspecting me. I also couldn't find the materials for an "detergent death" on the internet for some reason, even though the PPH said that the materials were unregulated. Any other feasible methods would be appreciated except for jumping, as I am terrified of heights.
I'm really starting to worry that I won't be dead by tomorrow though. To make matters worse, my good friend canceled the plans I made with him for tomorrow. These plans either served as a goodbye If I managed to find a method, or as much needed comfort in case I make it past the deadline. Either way, he cancelled due to family obligations. I've been trying to get ahold of him to ask if I can still call him tomorrow, but no response so far.
I just want to die. I can't take much more of feeling like this.
