If I am fucked for life due to my extensive trauma, what's the point in fighting

[Water-Lily]

I really feel stupid for being in therapy. Nothing really matters at 23, still being an a triggering environment at home, and not being able to heal it sucks. Even when I do manage to get out trauma follows you for years after. Makes me think I am making a huge mistake for not killing myself. Trauma recover, especially from childhood, is impossible

 

[BlankUser]

Yes, chilhood trauma is one of the worst things. It shapes you for life. Children can't really process what is happening to them, they don't know how to respond. They brains haven't fully developed yet thus the damage is real and consequences can be horrible. I hate that my selfish parents put me through this. They literally destroyed a part of my life.

 

[Water-Lily]

Yes, chilhood trauma is one of the worst things. It shapes you for life. Children can't really process what is happening to them, they don't know how to respond. They brains haven't fully developed yet thus the damage is real and consequences can be horrible. I hate that my selfish parents put me through this. They literally destroyed a part of my life.

Same. Suicide is the only option for me. Even if by miracle I got an apartment or home now, my trauma will still follow me. It will still cripple me, so it not worth it

 

[BlankUser]

Same. Suicide is the only option for me. Even if by miracle I got an apartment or home now, my trauma will still follow me. It will still cripple me, so it not worth it

I understand how you feel. Trauma can creep into your life anytime to mess things up. Just don't make rash decisions when it comes to suicide. Do your research, vent. I noticed what helps a bit is having a supportive partner. Doesn't even have to be a romantic relationship. Because most therapists don't care about you. Getting a bit more freedom also helps. Distracting yourself if possible. Ignoring triggers. It's better not too dwell on the past too much, because thinking about it a lot makes you hate your life even more.

 

[Water-Lily]

I understand how you feel. Trauma can creep into your life anytime to mess things up. Just don't make rash decisions when it comes to suicide. Do your research, vent. I noticed what helps a bit is having a supportive partner. Doesn't even have to be a romantic relationship. Because most therapists don't care about you. Getting a bit more freedom also helps. Distracting yourself if possible. Ignoring triggers. It's better not too dwell on the past too much, because thinking about it a lot makes you hate your life even more.

I hate my life everyday, threaten people that I will kill myself, lash out, I am a fuckign mess
Anyways I need to review my methods. I would hate t fuck up and survive

 

[BlankUser]

I hate my life everyday, threaten people that I will kill myself, lash out, I am a fuckign mess
Anyways I need to review my methods. I would hate t fuck up and survive

Yes it seems that you are really frustrated and fed up with all of it. I'm sorry you have to go through this. Just don't resort to anger. It's better to distance yourself from people who trigger you. Comitting suicide is better when you're calm, so you don't make mistakes that you might regret.

 

[Water-Lily]

Yes it seems that you are really frustrated and fed up with all of it. I'm sorry you have to go through this. Just don't resort to anger. It's better to distance yourself from people who trigger you. Comitting suicide is better when you're calm, so you don't make mistakes that you might regret.

Right, cause if I end up in a coma or as a vegetable at that point I just want to be taken off life support. I want to die on my own terms and a method I research. So my death is in my control. There is also a revenge component to it too though