I don’t understand how anyone could ever want to exist

[FuneralCry]

I have never wanted to live and I have never been able to understand why life is seen as being worth living. There is no meaning or value to living. We are all just waiting around to die, eventually we will be forgotten about, like we never existed. The fact that life is a thing in the first place is absolutely horrifying. So much unnecessary pain for no purpose and just the fact that pain exists is enough to make me want to leave. Life is just endless problems and suffering all for the sake of it and humans do the same tasks on repeat for decades until their inevitable death. This could never be enjoyable and even if there was something positive about living it is just something to lose and cause us to experience more pain when that thing is lost. I am glad that I have no hope as it would just be a delusion. Life could only get worse for me.

There could never be a point to any of this and to me non existence will always be preferable to life, as it is the absence of everything. As long as someone exists things could get so much worse and anyone could experience the worst agony possible. I see no point to enduring this life when I could be peacefully not existing instead but of course it is very difficult to leave. Trying to trap people in miserable lives is cruel and dying should not be so unnecessarily awful. All that humans have to look forward to is old age and health problems anyway. I should have died a while ago, but of course I would have preferred to have never existed at all.

 

[sufferingextremely]

I understand where you are coming from. There was a time when I was excited about life, but that time has come and gone. To me, it is the most immoral thing on earth that my country doesn't have euthanasia as a legal service. I live in the U.S. and we are just barbaric.

 

[Worndown]

Everyone has a different story. Many if not most people are ok with existing. They lead fairly "normal" lives and set up suicide hotlines.
Others have a different view on this. Their perspectives differ enough that understanding each other might be difficult.

 

[Nirrend]

I have never wanted to live and I have never been able to understand why life is seen as being worth living. There is no meaning or value to living. We are all just waiting around to die, eventually we will be forgotten about, like we never existed. The fact that life is a thing in the first place is absolutely horrifying. So much unnecessary pain for no purpose and just the fact that pain exists is enough to make me want to leave. Life is just endless problems and suffering all for the sake of it and humans do the same tasks on repeat for decades until their inevitable death. This could never be enjoyable and even if there was something positive about living it is just something to lose and cause us to experience more pain when that thing is lost. I am glad that I have no hope as it would just be a delusion. Life could only get worse for me.

There could never be a point to any of this and to me non existence will always be preferable to life, as it is the absence of everything. As long as someone exists things could get so much worse and anyone could experience the worst agony possible. I see no point to enduring this life when I could be peacefully not existing instead but of course it is very difficult to leave. Trying to trap people in miserable lives is cruel and dying should not be so unnecessarily awful. All that humans have to look forward to is old age and health problems anyway. I should have died a while ago, but of course I would have preferred to have never existed at all.

Ha, I think that you are far from being alone in thinking that

I think the same thing and for me joy is just an illusion ^^

I wish you happiness @FuneralCry, it's easy to say, but I wish only that to Ss members

 

[juraviel]

believe it or not, people like life. minority experience pain that overwhelms their enjoyment of life. welcome to the minority.
when you feel content in life, that nice looking piece of chocolate in front of you is good enough of a reason to live. there doesn't have to be some grand purpose for your existence as long as you remain happy. and most people are (well, very few are truly happy - of course, but the point stands)
you sound like an anti-natalist, by far the most miserable group of people one can associate with

 

[tilsleepcomes]

That existential nihilism gets me, too.

The only things life promises are suffering and death, and what we do has no meaning in the end.

It's like, we won't care one way or the other when we are dead, so why not just hurry it along?

I could end the endless wanting and needing and suffering, rather than constantly grasping for a little relief, and racing for a little meaning that will be meaningless in the end.

I feel you.

 

[annique]

I think we may share similar concepts on the absurdity of life. Everytime I look around my surroundings when I'm carrying on with my daily chores, I see a mount of people roaming around seemingly on full autopilot mode. It is terrifying. And all of that so years ahead we will be faced against the deceases that come with old age. We can also factor in the likehood of having an accident everyday we wake up and get off our houses. This is so mindboggling to think we live in a world so objectively absent of a purpose worth all of the suffering we have to endure. Everyday I do almost the same things over and over again. I've got to forcefully eat so I just don't faint; I've got to go to the bathroom to expel out of my body all of those disgusting stuff. If we don't shower, we are repulsed by our own odor.



This is such a weird and bizarre existence. Life is this conscious thing just in between two imense voids. What for? Even if there were gods, why would they come to exist rather than existing nothing at all. That way, no suffering would have to be countered by gods, beliefs or anything else. Just pure nothingness as of the pleasures as of the sufferings.

 

[adventurer]

i think there's often different reasons that people don't want to exist. it could be the nature of existence itself that causes them to want out. it could be a disorder such as depression of anxiety. there's so many reasons that someone could want to just get out of life.

 

[Againstthewind]

Y'know I wonder to myself (in what you have said) if our minds are able to cope with the world we are in now. When we supposedly evolved, we could only operate in the Hunt-Eat-Sleep-Reproduce ideologies of the caveman/women. As time has gone on we as humans have had to adapt to soooooooooo much, money, housing, politics, relationships, religion, family, employment, the internet. and everything in between. But, our brains don't adapt, it doesn't and cant physically change to the fast changes that have happened over time. We are the only specie that in away have that awareness of being able to to reflect on our own lives and existence, we're not that autopilot to other mammals. (maybe that's a bad thing) But I don't think we can handle the 9-5 of life because we were never created that way, so we are trying to re work our brains each time on the changes that we have and make it work. Having that awareness in a way is what brings us to being miserable and looking over our lives to regrets, mistakes, happiness, and ultimately wanting out own death. Maybe tha'ts why we have so many mental health issues, its our brain, saying 'ERROR TOO MUCH'.
Wishing you peace.

 

[keitaro]

this is so perfectly worded and totally relatable.

 

[Suicidebydeath]

I wish that you never had to suffer at all and I hope that your suffering is reduced until you ctb.

 

[Disperato]

I relate to many of these posts.

If we are alone, what is there to look forward to as an old person?

 

[betternever2havbeen]

believe it or not, people like life. minority experience pain that overwhelms their enjoyment of life. welcome to the minority.
when you feel content in life, that nice looking piece of chocolate in front of you is good enough of a reason to live. there doesn't have to be some grand purpose for your existence as long as you remain happy. and most people are (well, very few are truly happy - of course, but the point stands)
you sound like an anti-natalist, by far the most miserable group of people one can associate with

Lol I'm an antinatalist-it's far preferable to have the absence of pain for me than to have the "enjoyment" of life and no one asks to be born.

I have never wanted to live and I have never been able to understand why life is seen as being worth living. There is no meaning or value to living. We are all just waiting around to die, eventually we will be forgotten about, like we never existed. The fact that life is a thing in the first place is absolutely horrifying. So much unnecessary pain for no purpose and just the fact that pain exists is enough to make me want to leave. Life is just endless problems and suffering all for the sake of it and humans do the same tasks on repeat for decades until their inevitable death. This could never be enjoyable and even if there was something positive about living it is just something to lose and cause us to experience more pain when that thing is lost. I am glad that I have no hope as it would just be a delusion. Life could only get worse for me.

There could never be a point to any of this and to me non existence will always be preferable to life, as it is the absence of everything. As long as someone exists things could get so much worse and anyone could experience the worst agony possible. I see no point to enduring this life when I could be peacefully not existing instead but of course it is very difficult to leave. Trying to trap people in miserable lives is cruel and dying should not be so unnecessarily awful. All that humans have to look forward to is old age and health problems anyway. I should have died a while ago, but of course I would have preferred to have never existed at all.

@FuneralCry I agree. I was researching my family tree and thinking wow all these people are dead now, wish they never had kids whilst they were alive, I wouldn't have to be here now and they're long gone so what was even the point? It blows my mind that more people don't put such emphasis on suffering and pain. I know there's no point sitting around worrying about old age and death but it still sucks lets be honest and not just write it off as "oh it's natural, everyone suffers" oh everyone suffers that's alright then! Yeh no I will never accept suffering so I guess I will never accept life.

 

[Euthanza]

It's like the world is trying to kill us, sometimes it gives us virus pandemic, or bacteria to poison our food, perhaps toxic minerals in air we breathe, and the other times it sends us earthquake while we're sleeping at home.

But actually, it's human that's destroying earth and nature out of our ignorance and stupidity, just count how many species have been made in extinction since our domination. We really don't deserve the richness and great sorrow the earth has to offer.

But again, human thinks like we're superior ones, they don't allow us to kill ourselves peacefully. How stupid is that? George Carlin once said "Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that." Life is indeed absurd, it's made by and for the convenience of stupid people, exactly the reason why many great thinkers often contemplate about death and rarely be a happy person.

 

[Lost Magic]

I slept from 6pm Thursday to 9pm Friday (tonight). Even my dreams where sad reminders of my pitiful life. I sleep because I want to escape, not to be reminded of how horrible it is to be awake. Then when I do get up I have beyond horrible neighbour's noise to listen to. I have to start getting real about this dying shit because I don't want to exist much longer.

 

[WaitingAllMyLife]

I feel every word you wrote to my core. I can't imagine what it feels like to want to be alive.

 

[locked*n*loaded]

If I had any kind of a choice, I'd live. The way things are now, and how they've been for the past 25 years, or so, is that I'm only existing. At this is the problem. You're right, FuneralCry, I can't understand how anyone would just want to exist, either. I don't. And I can't any longer. Not much longer anyway.