DarkJason
Angry subhuman loser
- Oct 24, 2025
- 40
I feel so incredibly numb to almost everything nowadays. I haven't felt genuine happiness in ages. I have no real passions, talents, or any skills worth a damn. I don't have a "dream job", and I hate school with every fiber of my being. I'm actually going to graduate from high school next week, and I'm not going to miss it at all. The vast majority of the people there were insufferable assholes who constantly treated me like shit and disrespected me for seemingly no reason. I feel like I'm just bullshitting my way through life, while acting like I have actual aspirations that don't involve blowing my fucking brains out.
I don't give a fuck about anything at this point, all I'm doing is telling people what they want to hear so they don't catch on to how truly miserable and hopeless I actually am. Even getting out of bed is a struggle now. I'm getting to the point where interacting with people IRL fills me with dread, because I feel like everyone's judging me, or is waiting until I make some sort of "social screw-up" that they can use to justify endlessly tormenting me and making my already shit life so much worse. Even video games can't quite "do it" for me anymore, and I often only end up playing them for like an hour at most in a day, while I spend much longer than that just doomscrolling or listening to music while drowning in my own thoughts. I wish I killed myself years ago, and I feel so stupid for not doing so sooner. I'm almost certainly going to be dead by the end of this year, but I also thought that last year, and the year before that. Idk, but I feel like I NEED to die soon, because my life will only get worse and worse. What's even the point of being alive if you can hardly enjoy anything and live in almost constant misery?
I don't give a fuck about anything at this point, all I'm doing is telling people what they want to hear so they don't catch on to how truly miserable and hopeless I actually am. Even getting out of bed is a struggle now. I'm getting to the point where interacting with people IRL fills me with dread, because I feel like everyone's judging me, or is waiting until I make some sort of "social screw-up" that they can use to justify endlessly tormenting me and making my already shit life so much worse. Even video games can't quite "do it" for me anymore, and I often only end up playing them for like an hour at most in a day, while I spend much longer than that just doomscrolling or listening to music while drowning in my own thoughts. I wish I killed myself years ago, and I feel so stupid for not doing so sooner. I'm almost certainly going to be dead by the end of this year, but I also thought that last year, and the year before that. Idk, but I feel like I NEED to die soon, because my life will only get worse and worse. What's even the point of being alive if you can hardly enjoy anything and live in almost constant misery?
