How do you know when it’s time ?

[Bruces]

To ctb?

 

[TAW122]

When you have reached a certain point in life, a state of mind, calmness, and just general apathy. At least that's for me, so I can't speak for others specifically. I've resigned to the fact that life sucks, the things I want to have are not attainable, and given the way things are and will be in the coming years, decades, I've decided, nah, life isn't for me. I believe one is truly ready, ready when they just don't care about anything anymore, made up their mind, and have no doubts moving forward.

 

[omoidarui]

if you have to ask then it's probably not time

 

[4eyebiped]

This is one of those things that you have to decide for yourself. Everyone is bound to have a different point which it is time for them. We cannot answer this for you, only you can.

 

[lunatic]

When you have reached a certain point in life, a state of mind, calmness, and just general apathy. At least that's for me, so I can't speak for others specifically. I've resigned to the fact that life sucks, the things I want to have are not attainable, and given the way things are and will be in the coming years, decades, I've decided, nah, life isn't for me. I believe one is truly ready, ready when they just don't care about anything anymore, made up their mind, and have no doubts moving forward.

I agree with this 100%. For me wanting to leave isn't a sudden impulse or urge, it's something I've thought of for years and it seems like the best choice. I'm just done.

 

[Bruces]

I'm in no doubt that my life has been a complete and utter disaster and there's nothing to live for now but it's pushing yourself to do it

 

[Deleted member 17949]

I like to spin the big wheel and see what emotion it lands on to decide my actions for the day

 

[Bruces]

It can't be that hard to get yourself killed surely ?

 

[BitterlyAlive]

There's a feeling of finality. I'm ready to go. I'm not sure if I'm just numbed out/dissociated from basically having another breakdown or what, but I just feel a sense of acceptance.

This is how I'm going to finally stop my pain and suffering. I have it all planned out. Just a little bit longer, and it'll all be over. Thank God.

 

[262653]

When I'll feel a strong and continuous emotional surge that will carry me to my demise. Clearly, being certain that death is a better alternative for me isn't enough, otherwise I'd be lying amongst the dead already. I've also had several situations in my life when I wanted to do something for a long time but didn't up until I was overwhelmed with strong feelings. They felt unpleasant but so true and right, like anger that is expressed, not suppressed. Distraction (video games) prevents these feelings to appear. Can't react when there's no trigger.

I also noticed that I have hard time talking myself into a ctb state while others can do that accidentally, without much effort. I explain it this way. My subconscious knows my triggers and somehow manipulates me into avoiding them. Other people don't know what hurts me, nor do they care if they do (if they think they can can get away with it, of course), so I figured I could gain suicide fuel by talking about suicide-related things with others.

I have a repetitive dream pattern (repetitive enough to notice it, but not too much) where I run away, usually from a group of people, and when I'm cornered or surrounded, I turn around and fight. I think I'm in a fleeing stage, distracting from unpleasant thoughts about my position in life. When my distractions become ineffective again, when I will be exposed and imbued with emotional force strong enough to go against my survival instinct. That is when I will strike back.

I'm not trying to tell you when it's your time though. Everything I wrote above is my subjective view on my own experience. Treat it as such.

 

[CarbonMonoxide]

Eerie calmness. If you read about gun range suicides, there's a common theme. A well groomed patron comes in and rents a gun. They go about everything in a normal fashion. They chat with other patrons, fire off good shots and laugh at jokes. Noone suspects a thing. All of a sudden, when the attendant has his back turned, the seemingly normal patron blows their own brain out. If you've reached the point of no return, you can easily pass for any other guy, except you have a propensity for jumping off tall structures.

 

[Bruces]

absolutely everything in life bores me to my core,my job my home life the local pub all bore me to oblivion

 

[ebt88]

When you don't want to wakeup tomorrow

 

[AufH]

If you are sure that your future will not be better, nor any different, you are ready.
I kept myself alive for so long by just thinking that maybe something gets different.
But years and years pass and nothing ever changes, so whats the point.

 

[Bruces]

I've not wanted to wake up for years

 

[ARW3N]

Every minute of every hour of every day is the right time. I would kill myself right now if it wasn't for the fact that I don't have a glass of Nembutal or a gun in my hand. I'm left contemplating unappealing suicide methods such as jumping and hanging.

 

[Arrow]

You will know precisely when. It won't even really be a question. You'll know it in yourself, and you won't be so scared of it anymore.

 

[Alucard]

When you can't stand life anymore...