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everydayiloveyou

Arcanist
Jul 5, 2020
490
Do any of you guys go through periods of feeling really happy and positive, and then feeling super depressed and suicidal?

I was having such a tough summer, but now that I'm back in school, I've been feeling really happy on school days. I feel excited for life, not so fatalistic, and productive. I chat with classmates on my major's Discord and help everyone with homework. But then it all goes to shit when classes end on the weekends. Being a good student doesn't mean anything anywhere, once I'm at work or even just doing anything in general, I'm a complete idiot who sucks at everything. Everyone tells me how bad I am at things, nothing I do is ever right or good, except for my graded assignments. When it comes to homework, thats the only time I come anywhere close to being a capable person.

I know logically that this is just how emotions work and stuff. I know its not possible to be happy 24/7. But it still sucks to go from the highs to the lows, because it feels like the "low" is the default. How do you guys deal with it? My life has always been this way, so usually I just ride the waves, but I want to try to actively face these things rather than just let them come over me if that makes sense. Any advice or just shared experiences would help a ton!
 
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Reactions: ERASED, Amumu, I_love_to_bake and 2 others
mr.smileysad

mr.smileysad

Student
Aug 29, 2020
180
This sounds a lot like me it sucks and I haven't found much to deal with it either but try to find one thing you are good at outside of school where you can get a lot of praise and positivity
 
Sensei

Sensei

剣道家
Nov 4, 2019
6,336
I'm no psychologist, but that said, it sound like you could have cyclothymia.
 
Amumu

Amumu

Ctb - temporary solution for a permanent problem
Aug 29, 2020
2,623
No just not too sad and then imagining to shoot myself. It fluctuates between those two states.
 

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