green dependence

[tiredcat]

i've been smoking since i was a senior, so only about 2 years now, and let me tell you..

the first time i took a hit my mind went quiet and i never wanted to be without it after that.

there are some days where i have to be without it since i have no way of getting money. but it's been the longest i've been without it in a while recently and it's been a struggle trying to keep myself from thinking about ctb

weed gives my mind peace. a feeling that i am not actually here, that nothing matters. sometimes when i overdue it and i cant move i think it's how i feel would be described as the feeling before death. everything feels so nice and i'm happy. since i havent even had a little bit of that feeling in about a week and a half it's been hard. i'm trying my best to save what i can for it but money doesnt come out of nowhere.

all i can do is hope ig, i don't think i could go long term without it though.

 

[Lostandlooking]

Glad you get some relief from it! I've smoked for a couple of years, then switched to the bong. And now I still do edibles every once in a while. The effects are not as good as they used to be though. At least I think it used to be better. It makes me a bit calmer and makes me look at things with a different perspective. But I can still get overwhelmed with thoughts and my body is still tense. Still I'm glad it's available to me.

Hope you can get some soon. The feeling you described sounds like bliss.