And especially this year when I lost a lot of people close to me... It seems I'm abandoning them to the past, moving on hurts (and I never wanted to move on, I'm just weak to finish it, and I don't have methods).
I don't have a job, I live with my family (and that makes me very hard), dammit in February I'm already 24 years old and I haven't lived my life at all... I'm old and I don't even do what 16-year-olds do.
I need to rent a house and for that I need to get a job... but it's so hard. Killing yourself is also very difficult. It seems like God is forcing me to live a life that isn't mine.
The most ironic thing is that bad people (good people too) die young and without any disease (in any confrontation or execution), I who try to be honest stay on the fence (nobody kills me, but I can't live either. killing is also difficult).
Why does dying have to be something so simple (stupid) and so hard at the same time????
Oh, that's horrible... people accuse me of things I didn't do and charge me for things I already know (for example, not having a job). They say I'm to blame for being like this... okay! if it's true, nothing old changes! It's my fault whoever it is, but I just want to end this circus. Why do I need to be content and follow the rules of this morbid game?
Today I can't even understand how someone can be afraid of dying being forced to live in this hell
I don't have a job, I live with my family (and that makes me very hard), dammit in February I'm already 24 years old and I haven't lived my life at all... I'm old and I don't even do what 16-year-olds do.
I need to rent a house and for that I need to get a job... but it's so hard. Killing yourself is also very difficult. It seems like God is forcing me to live a life that isn't mine.
The most ironic thing is that bad people (good people too) die young and without any disease (in any confrontation or execution), I who try to be honest stay on the fence (nobody kills me, but I can't live either. killing is also difficult).
Why does dying have to be something so simple (stupid) and so hard at the same time????
Oh, that's horrible... people accuse me of things I didn't do and charge me for things I already know (for example, not having a job). They say I'm to blame for being like this... okay! if it's true, nothing old changes! It's my fault whoever it is, but I just want to end this circus. Why do I need to be content and follow the rules of this morbid game?
Today I can't even understand how someone can be afraid of dying being forced to live in this hell
