Chronically ill & Disabled users of SS: What is your illness?

[dearlybeloved998]

One of the main reasons I don't believe suicide is always irrational, is serious, life-altering chronic conditions. A common objection to suicidality by pro-life individuals is that suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.

However, it is scientifically proven that not all problems are temporary. Various autoimmune or neuropathic conditions exist that can limit a person's mobility, remove or significantly reduce a sense (eg, sight) or cause debilitating pain, fatigue and other symptoms.

While a lot of the time these conditions are managable, and the sufferers have a relatively good quality of life, and live relatively symptom free aside from the occasional 2 week flare-up, a lot of the time that isn't the case.

I decided to make this post to highlight to the pro-lifers lurking here how not everyone in this forum is making an irrational, impulsive decision when it comes to taking their own lives, and how some problems are simply not temporary, and neither are they managable.

So, asking all the members of this forum with serious disabilities or life altering conditions that are considering CTB: What is your illness called, and how does it affect your life? What have you done to learn to manage it and to save your own life?

I think a perfect example of a chronic illness that is neither temporary nor managable is Adam Maier Clayton, who suffered from Somatoform Disorder after smoking Marijuana and having a terrible panic attack, and long story short, his psychiatric condition made basics things such us speaking, reading, writing, and focusing extremely painful to the point where he had to ration out how much he talked to his own family and couldn't have friends. Thinking or focusing too hard alone was painful for this guy.

He didn't want to resort to suicide, tried very hard to save his life and believed that life is inherently a gift, despite there being some conditions, both medical and psychiatric that may make it anything other than that in certain cases. That's why 40+ treatments failed to save his life (including several forms of therapy, SSRI, SNRI, TCA, MAOI, antipsychotics, anticonvulsants, gabapentinoids, opioids, ketamine, and CBD).

Chronically ill and disabled users of SS, what is your story?

 

[BigGimpin]

My body is failing me, Im 52 and been in a wheelchair since I was 15 due to a motorcycle accident leaving me with a spinal cord injury, im paralyzed from the chest down. I never let it slow me down when I was younger, I was wild, from jumping my chair down flights of stairs to racing off road cars and actually winning a championship.

Once I hit my 30's things took a dramatic downward spiral. Started with back pain, then neuropathic pain that is unbearable! I feel like my entire body is in hot lava and the flesh is melting off my bones, and NOTHING changes them. I have been on opioids for over 20 years and now they dont work. My level of pain I deal with every second of every day is excruciating. My body is now failing me in so many ways I cant take it anymore. The last three years has been PURE HELL and I am ready to CTB asap. I hardly sleep but an hour a night, sometimes less, I cannot eat, my teeth have fallen out and I havent had a proper shower in 2 years when I lost the strength to do it myself.

I hate asking for help, I have been 100% independant my whole life, but now even that is going away, I dont want to die in a hospital, I want to die at home in peace, hoping to N from D.

If anyone has any advice on how to get PPeH it would be greatly appreciated! Want to get N from D really bad but im unable to download it. Will a copy from amazon have all the info I need?