Bpd vent

[bl33ding_heart]

If it seems like I'm venting on this site too much I'm just in so much pain and have almost no one to share my feelings with and rely on at the moment :p

I fucking hate having bpd, it's one of the most miserable and exhausting mental disorders to exist. Having bpd is the mental equivalent to your body being covered in 3rd degree burns. We feel too much of everything, and we crave love and care too much like it's the oxygen we need but once we get too much of it we start choking.

I don't even feel human, I feel like some over emotional grotesque creature. But at the same time I feel way too human to the point just existing hurts.

And I can't help but unintentionally hurt the people around me and struggle to hold together relationships and friendships. It's like I will never truly be good enough for anyone.

No matter how hard I try to better myself and change myself to be a better person, one little trigger or slip up and I'm back at square one. It's so fucking exhausting and I hate it with every fiber in me.

Is there even really hope for people with bpd? The successful suicide rates are 1 in 10 for people with bpd, and the unsuccessful are 7/10. Way over half of the people with this mental cancer end up trying to end their life at some point.

Yet we're seen as "evil and manipulative" people that need to be tamed. I'm so sick of having bpd and I'm so fucking sick of people acting like we're monsters when in reality we're just hurting people that wanna be loved.

If anyone else with bpd is reading this, just know I don't think you're a monster, and I feel and understand your pain.

 

[onlyforever1]

i am a monster though

 

[bl33ding_heart]

i am a monster though

Even if you've hurt people before, or said some crazy things while splitting on people, that doesn't make you a monster. You have a mental illness and you're hurting, and that's not and will never be your fault. You didn't ask for this. A lot of borderlines go undiagnosed or aren't able to get the proper help and support the need. Just know you deserve to be loved and cared about just as much as anyone else does

 

[toxicjester]

If it seems like I'm venting on this site too much I'm just in so much pain and have almost no one to share my feelings with and rely on at the moment :p

I fucking hate having bpd, it's one of the most miserable and exhausting mental disorders to exist. Having bpd is the mental equivalent to your body being covered in 3rd degree burns. We feel too much of everything, and we crave love and care too much like it's the oxygen we need but once we get too much of it we start choking.

I don't even feel human, I feel like some over emotional grotesque creature. But at the same time I feel way too human to the point just existing hurts.

And I can't help but unintentionally hurt the people around me and struggle to hold together relationships and friendships. It's like I will never truly be good enough for anyone.

No matter how hard I try to better myself and change myself to be a better person, one little trigger or slip up and I'm back at square one. It's so fucking exhausting and I hate it with every fiber in me.

Is there even really hope for people with bpd? The successful suicide rates are 1 in 10 for people with bpd, and the unsuccessful are 7/10. Way over half of the people with this mental cancer end up trying to end their life at some point.

Yet we're seen as "evil and manipulative" people that need to be tamed. I'm so sick of having bpd and I'm so fucking sick of people acting like we're monsters when in reality we're just hurting people that wanna be loved.

If anyone else with bpd is reading this, just know I don't think you're a monster, and I feel and understand your pain.

I understand your pain and I'm so so sorry
For others to think we don't even try
Or getting upset when we "overreact"
It's so exhausting all the time
Sending you love and patience

 

[The Actual Devil]

I will admit, as recently as a couple of months ago, when I first joined SaSu, I had a lot of biases against people with Cluster B Personality Disorders. Mainly ASPD and NPD, but I am still deeply sorry to all people with a Cluster B for my past remarks during my first few weeks here. I got called out for them, had a long conversation with a person who lives with BPD, and I have realized the error of my ways. You don't deserve discrimination; you deserve

If anyone else with bpd is reading this, just know I don't think you're a monster, and I feel and understand your pain.

I don't think any of you are monsters, either. I hear you, and now I'm always trying to understand your pain better.

 

[bl33ding_heart]

I will admit, as recently as a couple of months ago, when I first joined SaSu, I had a lot of biases against people with Cluster B Personality Disorders. Mainly ASPD and NPD, but I am still deeply sorry to all people with a Cluster B for my past remarks during my first few weeks here. I got called out for them, had a long conversation with a person who lives with BPD, and I have realized the error of my ways. You don't deserve discrimination; you deserve



I don't think any of you are monsters, either. I hear you, and now I'm always trying to understand your pain better.

I'm really glad you learnt to understand us instead of just judging us by ignorant stereotypes, I wish more people were like you.