Body horror venting

[GraySloth]

I just have to get this out. I believe the reasons I have for not wanting to be alive are not impulsive or frivolous, nor are they circumstantial or remediable, but rather deeply philosophical and logical. That being said, holy fuck does being alive just suck ass. My teeth hurt, my skin hurts, my eyes hurt. I don't even have a condition; there is nothing wrong with my body, just being trapped in it is awful. I wish I could just peacefully and quietly wait out being alive, but it's just so fucking annoying I don't know how anyone puts up with this. Even if these issues were alleviated, I would still intellectually not want to be alive, but that it also has to be this bad and I have the knowledge that this is never going to get better, that every day will be even worse than the last until the bitter end, is a horror, a living nightmare. I would pray to god for death if I could even for a moment string a thought together, wrapped in this wretched, rotting meat.

 

[FuneralCry]

I really understand as I'd personally never wish to exist, to me existence just feels like the most terrible tragic mistake that just causes so much pain and problems there were never a need for with no limit as to how much one can suffer, I'd just never wish to be conscious of anything at all and I always see it as a tragedy how this existence was even imposed, I also suffer just from being trapped in this futile, torturous existence.