Venting Being open about being suicidal has only caused me to lose people.

[pokerrkitty]

I recently broke down to two long-term internet friends of mine. Both of them directly asked me what was going on. I told them it was a very heavy topic and asked if they were sure they wonted to know- they said yes. I explained that I was planning to kill myself, my 24/7 feelings of guilt, and how much I hated having to hide it.

They gave me the usual, sending me hotlines and telling me that I wasn't alone. I told them I didn't want any of that, that I really just wanted someone to listen to what I have to say without freaking out. Neither responded to that.

A day later one of them sent me a message more or less saying that suicide was a logical fallacy and hurts everyone around me for no reason. The other just hasn't spoken to me again outside of small talk.

 

[Claymore7274]

Same, i left a 5 year long discord friend group, because of some impulsive shit on my part. one of them has reached out to me but i honestly think i'm past the point of no return

 

[pokerrkitty]

Same, i left a 5 year long discord friend group, because of some impulsive shit on my part. one of them has reached out to me but i honestly think i'm past the point of no return

i'm so sorry. It's really exhausting to be mentally ill, but even more so to be rejected by people who care about you when you show symptoms.

 

[Claymore7274]

i'm so sorry. It's really exhausting to be mentally ill, but even more so to be rejected by people who care about you when you show symptoms.

Yeah, most people don't understand or don't want to understand the topic of suicide, mostly because we've been taught to live despite all of our suffering

 

[interna]

they call us selfish and then force us to keep on living

 

[MyLifeisHell]

A day later one of them sent me a message more or less saying that suicide was a logical fallacy and hurts everyone around me for no reason. The other just hasn't spoken to me again outside of small talk.

It may be hurt people but surely it isn't for "no reason"...

Similar experience. That's why the "just reach out" crowd is kinda full of it.

 

[blackIronPrison]

my best friend of nearly 9 years entirely stopped talking to me after i opened up about it with an iota of detail beyond just vaguely "not feeling it"

 

[Hibiki]

how would you feel if you were to not hide it in the first place, essentially filtering out those incapable of supporting you, and guaranteeing that anyone who sticks around accepts and is there for you? i posted about a similar thing some time ago and would be interested to hear your opinion. i tend not to worry about hiding my sh scars sometimes, so a lot of people find out about my depression that way. in my experience it hasn't made me feel any lonelier than i already do. at the same time, however, i'm not direct about it with most of my friends, and tend to avoid mentioning my depression outright