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hfdepression30

hfdepression30

Experienced
Mar 30, 2021
236
I hate saying "yes I'm doing it" and then getting overwhelmed with shame and disappointment when I fail, but I really want to try this weekend.. I really want to make my greatest effort to get out of this life.
 
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Reactions: ready2go, death137, Mellowness and 7 others
WornOutLife

WornOutLife

マット
Mar 22, 2020
7,183
Oh, I wasn't expecting to see you leave so soon.
Damn, whatever happens I just wish you a peace journey and lots of love.

As for me, I dunno if I'll ever ctb but if I do, I will certainly die during a weekend while getting drunk af lol.
 
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hfdepression30

hfdepression30

Experienced
Mar 30, 2021
236
Oh, I wasn't expecting to see you leave so soon.
Damn, whatever happens I just wish you a peace journey and lots of love.

As for me, I dunno if I'll ever ctb but if I do, I will certainly die during a weekend while getting drunk af lol.
Yeah, it's been less than two weeks since I've been here but I'm so desperate to ctb. I just really hope that I can pull together enough courage to finally succeed—
 
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fred farkle

fred farkle

Specialist
Dec 17, 2020
346
i am fesperate to ctb,but i am not ready. maybe this summer? i just dont want to be nothing...
 
Mellowness

Mellowness

Member
Feb 22, 2021
18
I wanted to do it this weekend, but I still have to wait on my SN. So I guess I'll just have to wait a little bit longer.
 
Bat 17

Bat 17

Bat 17
Mar 30, 2021
307
I hate saying "yes I'm doing it" and then getting overwhelmed with shame and disappointment when I fail, but I really want to try this weekend.. I really want to make my greatest effort to get out of this life.
You seem like a good bloke, I will be pleased to see you stick around and hope you do.

I'm sorry things have got to the place where it seems CTB is the best option. I remember the feeling. But there's no shame in not CTBing, it's definitely not a failure or shameful. Just know that we all have your back whatever you decide to do
 
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R

ready2go

Member
Mar 10, 2021
42
Hopefully Sunday!
 
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Reactions: popcorn and yive
R

Rabbit50

Member
Apr 5, 2022
77
I keep thinking I'm going to ctb, but still can't decide on a method. I really like the hydrogen sulphide idea but don't know exactly which products to buy. Then I think about jumping off a bridge in to a river but worry about surviving. It's indecisiveness that has got me to the state of mind that I'm in, and now I'm being indecisive about how to ctb.
 
R

Rabbit50

Member
Apr 5, 2022
77
Are you still with us? Just wondering if you had a change of mind.
 
Mr. Incapable

Mr. Incapable

Also inadequate, incompetent, weak & powerless
Jun 21, 2022
175
Are you still with us? Just wondering if you had a change of mind.
If they have a line through their name they are deleted
Hi. I'm actually the OP of this post. I am still here. I wasn't able to go through with it back then and eventually I ended up leaving SS in order to see if I could improve things and change my life if I focus my attention somewhere else.. long story short, a year later, nothing has changed and I feel the same.. worse even.. and my current situation is such a shit show that I feel like I really have no other option, no second chances now.. I need to do it but I don't know how to build the courage to endure those final moments.. SI really has a chokehold on me
 
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Reactions: Emmie, Deleted member 31858, The_Flying_Fox and 1 other person

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