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hopelessbeing

Member
Aug 10, 2022
16
This is one of the reasons I want to CTB. I just feel like a massive burden to my family due to my mental health issues and past suicide attempts. I know all I do is worry them and hurt them. I genuinely think they would be better off without me in their lives. I mean I've tried to get better for them, I've tried medications and therapy. If I'm completely honest I don't want to get better anyway. I just want to be gone, to disappear. I wish I could just be gone and forgotten I know it will hurt them and that destroys me but at the same time I don't know how much longer I can keep living like this. I feel stuck. Like I am living an existence I don't want for other people. Anyway I know one day all of this will get the better of me and I hope the attempt works this time. I am just sorry to my family more than they will ever know.
 
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1000winds

1000winds

Student
Jul 24, 2022
152
feeling like a burden is the main reason i want to ctb. even though it's sure going to hurt my parents and siblings, i take comfort in the fact that after months or years i'll be a distant memory and their lives will go on.
 
Fadeawaaaay

Fadeawaaaay

Visionary
Nov 12, 2021
2,156
I know that people love me and would like for me to Continue to be alive but I am a burden. I bring a dark energy to anybody I'm with. People don't really listen to anything I say anymore or respect me and I don't blame them. People pity me. I would really rather be alone than experience pity. I wish there were an easy way to disappear. But I realize that I'm just going to continue to be alive unless I put an end to this. When people ask me how I am I say good. I got tired of people feeling sorry for me and trying to help me.
 
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Funeralprincess

Death never turned on me
May 8, 2022
432
No I don't feel like a burden… I KNOW I'm a burden
I know that people love me and would like for me to Continue to be alive but I am a burden. I bring a dark energy to anybody I'm with. People don't really listen to anything I say anymore or respect me and I don't blame them. People pity me. I would really rather be alone than experience pity. I wish there were an easy way to disappear. But I realize that I'm just going to continue to be alive unless I put an end to this. When people ask me how I am I say good. I got tired of people feeling sorry for me and trying to help me.

Yeah ive told people this. Pity is kind of disrespectful. Empathy is one thing and I highly respect that, but pity? We aren't fucking charity cases. You either love us for us or you dont. The entire notion around someone being in a mentally ill persons life or presence because they feel pity is really insulting
 
nys

nys

mors mihi lucrum
Jun 1, 2022
269
I kind of feel like one too. My parents are highly educated with doctorate degrees from extremely selective universities and one's a college professor while the other is a software developer at a Fortune 500 company. They're both so successful with such good careers and I'm still in high school, but I have no idea what I'm going to do with my future and I've done nothing that's going to impress colleges. I'm never going to be as successful as them. That's not the main reason I'm going to ctb, but it's a tiny part of it
 

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