I wish to be them, to not exist is all I personally hope for, I'd always prefer to not exist than suffer in this cruel, tortuous existence just waiting to cease existing anyway, all I personally hope for is peace from this existence of unnecessary suffering. I'd always prefer to not exist than be trapped in this existence of suffering all for the sake of it just hoping to not exist and waiting to cease existing anyway, I always suffer so much from being so cruelly denied the option to just peacefully cease existing to save myself from all future suffering in this existence where there is no limit as to how much agony one can feel, non-existence really is the only relief for me, it's all I see as desirable.