would you want to die at your happiest or at your most distraught?

[LastLoveSong]

was listening to my favorite songs right before running towards the train and i was the happiest person on earth when i ran. but it's contradictory because i was absolutely at my worst in life.

I don't really see that as contradictory, you were escaping your agony no?

 

[purplesky9]

I want my last moments to be happy.

 

[moonlightbeach]

I don't really see that as contradictory, you were escaping your agony no?

in my view, everything that led me to ctb were some of the worst facts i had to face in my life. i discovered how fucked up my childhood was, how i was masking my whole life, how i was living a dream all the time and i expressed so much agony, it wasn't pleasant. it's more of the revelation that was hard and realizing that i'm disabled and have been and have been faking feeling well for so long. that was painful and hard. but the ctb attempt itself was, indeed, 2nd best thing ever happened to me after gender euphoria, thx for asking,<3

 

[DontTouchMeImFamous]

I feel it would be nice to die happy rather than sad