
merumeru
wish I wasn’t born
- Aug 17, 2025
- 4
I'm not religious or anything but I'm so fucking scared of where I'll go after I ctb. I've never been good at anything my whole life I sucked at studying sucked at any hobby I did anything I tried I was bad at. People gave up on me I posted on Reddit "is it over for me if I fail my entrance exam" and everyone was shaming me even after I deleted the post it made it even worse for me they said stuff like "your too stupid and you will never make it in life even if you had passed" I don't understand why people are so mean. I don't have any friends anymore the one person I thought was my "friend" doesn't even see me as a friend she just sees me as a backup friend for when she gets bored. And for me I wish I had some fucking self respect to say no. I'm only 18 but I feel like my life has already ended I failed to get into a university my parents kicked me out but I'm okay with it because as soon as they found out I failed they beat the shit out of me and kicked me out onto the streets so now I'm living off couch hopping and love hotels because I have money from my part time job. But i feel like such a waste I wasted my life I didn't work hard to study because I was depressed from being abused by my parents everyday I hate how some people are born into normal families while I have it bad. I wish I had done something with my life I used to have a bright future I used to like dancing and was scouted by some companies and my parents refused to let me join. Because they thought "studying is better" but now I always wonder what if I had went down a different path. Anyways I'm just venting my life story I probably won't be here soon at least not make it to December