Yeah this definitely get that. I was targeted for my appearance and now I'm deeply insecure about the way I look.
Had an argument with people online because I commented on how it's always attractive people saying there is no point in being insecure and self-confidence is key. It frustrated me badly because I'm trying to explain that even with self-confidence, it won't change the way I look, I'll always be perceived as ugly and it annoyed me when people who aren't say such things because I think they wouldn't understand what it's like to be left out and bullied because of the way you look.
However, I keep an open mind. As much as I get annoyed by the saying, looks really aren't everything, however they definitely matter to an extent. The first thing people see about you is your physical appearance and you will get judged for it as a first impression, but personality is what leads people to stay (unless you're superficial..which a lot of people are it seems). Attractive people with nasty personalities generally lack having genuine connections and relationships, usually when they have supposed large friendships it's really fake and hate each other behind their masks.
Of course I can't deny the fact that "pretty privilege" exists. Yes, people who are attractive generally have more of an advantage than those considered unattractive. They get treated better, they get more potential opportunities, they are approached more, etc. It's frustrating and can lead to envy, I understand that feeling a lot, but there's no point in feeling envious. I've also seen the perspective of those who are attractive naturally but desired to be less attractive because they can't tell if they're friends like them for them or only with them for their looks, plus having to deal with unwarranted jealousy and targeted for it. So I kinda just generally concluded that society is superficial as hell.
When it comes to physical appearance in romantic relationships that's a whole different ordeal, where looks are valued more per se. I'm not gonna judge people for not finding someone attractive, that's okay. Everyone has their preferences, and I'd expect someone to want to be physically attracted to their partner in some way at least. However, personality really does grow more attraction. Another thing I also realize that beauty standards really are super subjective when coming across social media. I would see videos of people I'd consider attractive but the comments would say otherwise, and vice versa. Also looking at beatury standards across race, cultures, and history and seeing how different it is, really made me realize that beauty shouldn't be taken so seriously, it's funny thinking about it. Now I don't see a problem of being deemed unattractive because standards really do vary and change a lot. Yeah I get there is being considered "universally less attractive" but it's whatever.
The bad part is people treating other differently for their appearance, judging them and criticizing them (especially for things they can't change, plus shouldn't be shamed to if there really isn't any need to). I will always dislike bullies and superficial people.
