When your nightmares come true.

[sad jester]

You ever go into a situation extremely excited and wanting something good to come of it, but you've been so conditioned to disappointment that an overwhelming feeling of hopelessness also comes over you? Then of course just as you predicted, despite your best effort to prevent the worst case scenario from happening, it happens anyway, leaving you feeling at your lowest of low. I swear there is no greater desire to CTB than when my nightmares come true.

 

[Why Me?]

This happened to me when my business closed. Life was already a life long nightmare but my business gave me hope. Now the worst case scenario is true, the last 20 years after high school down the drain, with nothing to show for it. I want to CTB now more than ever. A life consumed by crisis. I'm exhausted, I really don't have nothing left to give, but another roll of the dice.

 

[FuneralCry]

It does seem as though in a life like this, if there is anything positive it will just lead to more suffering when that thing is taken away. It's an extremely cruel and depressing existence and it's so awful how there is no limit as to how bad things can get.

 

[tiny_dancer]

Yup, I totally get it. I have heard so many times that "things never turn out as badly as you expect", "the worst case scenario almost never happens, etc." Well, it happened to me and I am living my worst nightmare. I'm sorry you are experiencing what you are too.