Discussion Warning about certain suicide mentality

[Sadbanana]

It happened to me that I basically started neglecting everything in my life, because I was planning to cbt. "What does it metter if I'm going to die soon anyway."

At first when you are in that not give a fuck mentality, it feels very liberating. But the feeling will soon pass and only the procrastination stays.

I neglected my health and my future because of it. Now I have some back pain issues that could have been preventable if I started solving them sooner. And I wasn't able to do it in the end. The method I was planning to use didn't work and I'm too much of a coward to jump or to hang myself.

I think you should never relly that you will be able to cbt. Always make sure to make your future life as bearable as possible as if you are going to keep living.

 

[cheaptrick]

I agree. I think this mentality only works if you plan to CTB the same day because there is a limit to the collateral damage that can cause in a single day. Even then you should consider what happens if you can't.

 

[FF777]

this is very true, especially for the lesson i learned: DO NOT STOP PAYING YOUR RENT....... i waited to CTB until the day before i was going to be evicted (i purposely stopped paying rent), but then i got SUPER TERRIFIED and realized i am not ready to CTB yet.... so then i had to rush to try to cancel the eviction and i had to come up with $900+ dollars in back-rent and late fees etc for them to cancel my eviction..... so it's really best to assume that you are going to live for ever, even if you are wanting to maybe CTB soon.. SI (survival instinct) is often a LOT stronger than people realize it is going to be, and it will make you terrified to actually try to CTB when you think you are ready to do it..

 

[limenlux]

I think you should never relly that you will be able to cbt. Always make sure to make your future life as bearable as possible as if you are going to keep living.

I am begging anyone who reads this thread to take this advice to heart. Your opportunity or even desire to CTB may come and go, but there is no upper limit on the amount of suffering you can bring upon yourself by neglecting to consider the future while under the assumption that you will be dead. You do not want to be me, I promise.

 

[Forveleth]

In the same boat. I let go of my health and now I am fat and gross and still alive. I have adopted the philosophy of "living until I am dead". I am taking better care of myself, even planning for the long-term future. I never want to put myself in a corner where "I am supposed to be dead" is the issue.