Venting Waiting for my CTB date feels so long and painful

[mackoo]

My CTB date is in the first week of August, mostly due to practical reasons (having a proper location, buying SN, etc.). It's only a couple of weeks away but god does it feel so far away… If I could I would just get it over with, but I can't. I hope time could pass more quickly because I genuinely can't deal with this internal pain everyday anymore. I just want peace

 

[FuneralCry]

I really understand finding it so torturous and painful to suffer in this existence, I just want to be gone as well, I hope you find the peace you search for.

 

[Passenger4224]

I totally get that. I was originally going to CTB on my birthday earlier in the year and found the waiting to be unbearable. Do you find the thoughts to be completely consuming your brain?

It gets scarier as it gets closer to the chosen date. Try to embrace what you can out of the time you have left.