Help Traumatizing methods?

[livershapedbox]

I'd like my suicide to be as traumatizing as possible for my mother since it's all her fault, but all the brutal looking methods I can think of seem difficult to do properly (cutting an artery would probably be difficult because of SI and the pain, and I can't get a gun because I live in an authoritarian country).
So which easy to pull off methods would look the worst?