encore
she/her • BPD • rOCD
- Nov 14, 2024
- 165
not looking for advice, this is just another self pity vent but if you relate or had a similar experience, do let me know
had an argument with a friend today. i tried to speak up but got talked over until i eventually snapped and raised my voice, i felt so disrespected and then just got straight up dismissed by them. i could hear them giggle, i guess me losing my composure was entertaining or whatever, but either way after it was over i started crying uncontrollably both from not being taken seriously and my sense of justice acting up since i did firmly believe they weren't in the right and had very little empathy in the side they had taken. this whole situation reminded me about how unfit i am for this world, and how the only way for me to feel normal or be accepted is by bottling up my emotions and getting "stronger" mentally.
i hate the fact that i need to hide my sensitivity if i want people to listen to me. it seems like the moment i show my passion or emotions in an argument, it all becomes irrelevant because caring about certain things to the point it causes you strong emotions is "childish". either that, or people become visibly uncomfortable, as if they never saw someone feel things deeply before... i can't stand this.
had an argument with a friend today. i tried to speak up but got talked over until i eventually snapped and raised my voice, i felt so disrespected and then just got straight up dismissed by them. i could hear them giggle, i guess me losing my composure was entertaining or whatever, but either way after it was over i started crying uncontrollably both from not being taken seriously and my sense of justice acting up since i did firmly believe they weren't in the right and had very little empathy in the side they had taken. this whole situation reminded me about how unfit i am for this world, and how the only way for me to feel normal or be accepted is by bottling up my emotions and getting "stronger" mentally.
i hate the fact that i need to hide my sensitivity if i want people to listen to me. it seems like the moment i show my passion or emotions in an argument, it all becomes irrelevant because caring about certain things to the point it causes you strong emotions is "childish". either that, or people become visibly uncomfortable, as if they never saw someone feel things deeply before... i can't stand this.
