Intelligent_Panic99
Student
- Jan 4, 2022
- 114
I asked my (old) therapist to block me so I wouldn't be tempted to ask her for help when things got worse. So I made sure I was blocked on text(we both have iPhones so you can tell) and then I emailed her my exact plan. Lol. I figured if she did block me on text, she must have also done on email as I said to. I have literally no idea why I emailed except I blame my broken brain.
No response of course.
So what's worse? she did block me and so didn't see it. She didn't block me and did see it. (This was several weeks ago.) If she did read it, there is nothing she can actually act upon (like have me committed) because I made sure to note it was a future plan.
I'm a fucking loser. I love her (Like I actually stupidly love her because I'm very attracted to her - I am gay - and because for a moment in time she made me feel safe and wanted which no one really ever had before) and she was willing to just block me (ok, so I know I asked her to! But I am mentally unstable, remember?) and forget I exist. Life is stupid. I am stupid. I really want to die.
No response of course.
So what's worse? she did block me and so didn't see it. She didn't block me and did see it. (This was several weeks ago.) If she did read it, there is nothing she can actually act upon (like have me committed) because I made sure to note it was a future plan.
I'm a fucking loser. I love her (Like I actually stupidly love her because I'm very attracted to her - I am gay - and because for a moment in time she made me feel safe and wanted which no one really ever had before) and she was willing to just block me (ok, so I know I asked her to! But I am mentally unstable, remember?) and forget I exist. Life is stupid. I am stupid. I really want to die.
