I plan on writing one...but I know I can't put everything into words.
So it will be instructions about what I want to be done and other information....funeral, bank info, passwords etc etc.
The rest of what I wanted to say, Ive said in audio recordings.
Ive since recorded about 20 or so 1 hour or more sessions.
These sessions are a chronological biography of myself and my personal feelings about myself....because I want my family (and whoever they allow to listen as well) to know about things that I have never talked about openly. It allows them to hear all this in my own voice.
Sometimes I emotionally break down during my discussion of certain things...I don't know why I do this...I guess I am still dealing with my decision to end things.
I know my action will hurt my family immensely....and I explain in my recordings that I don't wish them emotional pain.
Its just that Ive got to a point in my life that its fallen so far apart, that I can't fix things to a point that a future life would be enjoyable.
I also feel a lot of guilt of allowing my life to fall apart so much.
I know they won't accept that and they won't understand. But maybe one day they will.
I love them very much.