suicide is selfish?

[girafeli]

why would someone say that to me? i told them i wanted to kill myself. they called me selfish. they said i'll just be leaving them alone. why is it selfish? am i selfish?

 

[february flyer]

You're not selfish. Suicide isn't selfish. It's selfish of the person to put their personal desires above yours to minimize what you feel.

 

[tiredcatboy]

It's not selfish at all.

 

[w8forme]

youre not selfish, its not selfish to want to leave a place where you never asked to be

 

[Captive_Mind515]

Guilt tripping is one of society's main tools for keeping suffering people stuck in this life against their will.

You're not selfish, but there is very little point in trying to reason with some people who have fully bought into this way of thinking.

 

[FuneralCry]

No, I find it so disgusting how pro-lifers want others to be tortured in this existence for as long as possible against their wishes, forcing people to suffer in this dreadful, futile existence is a crime to me.

I see nothing more selfish than imposing this existence in the first place that just causes all this terrible, dreadful suffering all for the sake of it and problems there were never a need for with no limit as to how much one can be tortured. It's just so horrific to me how anti-suicide people want to do all they can to make this existence into a prison where one cannot painlessly escape on their own terms, anti-suicide is so selfish, all that anti-suicide does is just cause way more suffering, harm and torture, I see so much evil in how they want to force others to experience all the torture and pain of this existence that was so tragically imposed.

 

[Forever Sleep]

Sadly, the nature of this existence means we are all very likely to commit selfish acts. Yet we normalize the ones that suit us. Ending a sentient creatures life in order to eat it, wear it or because we want the land it lives on is selfish. We are selfish from the moment we are born. We cry and wake our parents up in order to get our own needs fulfilled. We're even encouraged to selfishly pursue our goals sometimes. Our careers or hobbies. You've either got to be hugely altruistic or hugely lucky if all you want to do in life doesn't end up selfishly exploiting another.

Suicide is selfish in as much as it knowingly inflicts grief on our loved ones prematurely. But then, as so many others have said- expecting us to stay here and suffer purely for their sake is also a selfish wish.

The bigger problem as I see it is our general attitude and lack of understanding/ empathy towards things like mental illness and just generally how we experience life. I just think a lot of people maybe can't even comprehend how it feels to be so unhappy we are suicidal for an extended period. I think they just see the same problems we all have and can't understand or accept that maybe some people can't seem to get over them. So, I think there's this frustration we aren't trying hard enough plus- hurt feelings- that we won't try harder for their sake.

I suppose it's normal not to want to be abandoned or that we aren't enough, or our feelings aren't enough to make someone stay. It's sad though really- that there seems little or no effort to really consider how bad a person must be feeling to be considering ending their life.

 

[Lamentice]

why would someone say that to me? i told them i wanted to kill myself. they called me selfish. they said i'll just be leaving them alone. why is it selfish? am i selfish?

It's selfish because they don't want you to, clearly! (See the irony?)

 

[Zaphkiel]

Let's not lie to ourselves.
It IS selfish because you make other suffers to end your own suffering.
But it is also selfish to cage someone into an unwanted existence.
There is no good outcome.

 

[Unsure and Useless]

Similar to what Forever Sleep said

It doesn't matter what you do: it's going to be selfish. Nothing is inherently selfish/not selfish; it just is, and we naturally assign meaning to it based on our experiences because that's human nature. If someone wants to, they can twist whatever they want to fit their narrative

 

[Lost Magic]

I've been told I was selfish when I expressed not wanting to be here too. It's a very common response in a world that considers suicide, or the very mention of it: 'the ultimate taboo topic.' People are scared to talk about it.

 

[Nighthawk]

It is not possible not to be selfish. We are all selfish. People who commit suicide are selfish because they want to free themselves from pain. People who try to stop others from committing suicide are selfish as well, because they are saving them for countless different selfish reasons. People pleasers are selfish because they want others to like them. Religious people who help others do so because they believe that is how they buy themselves a ticket to heaven.

"Your desire to be selfless is selfish." — U. G. Krishnamurti (not to be confused with Jiddu Krishnamurti)

 

[Jadeith]

It all depends how you define "selfish" and how much emotion you assign to the word itself.
Let's imagine an item you always wanted. And now you can afford it and you buy it. Is it selfish? You did it for yourself, no? Is it bad that you did? You could donate the money to the charity instead. And you owning the item might bring jealousy (discomfort) to others who also wanted it but can't afford it yet.
Suicide is a gift to suffering person of much greater magnitude than any item could ever be, also in all aforementioned dimensions. You take your life, permanently erasing your pain. You finally did something for yourself. But - you could donate this life to others. And your act will make some people uncomfortable one way or another.
So is it "selfish"? I guess we could say that. Is it bad to be selfish this way? I wouldn't be so sure about that.

There's also argument that it's the others that are selfish by guilt tripping you and keeping you here against your will but personally i don't like it as it is kinda like Tu quoque fallacy.

 

[Gustav Hartmann]

There is a distinction between altruistic and egoistic suicide. In my opinion suicide should alway be egoistic/selfish. Altruistic suicide has for me the bitter aftertaste of feeling obliged to or even being forced to kill oneself.

 

[RadiantNumber]

no, people who tell it'sselfish are selfish, because instead of helping they would rather say it is selfish. Morons

 

[persepexa]

Unfortunately suicide is selfish. You are putting your own needs ahead of others. You are hurting other people because it would make you feel better. I've made my piece with the fact my suicide is a selfish decision that will hurt other people. The only one that will benefit in any way is me because my pain will be gone.

 

[Alpacachino]

It was more selfish of them to say that. Ask them if then you should just exist for their happiness and not your own. So should you exist just so that they don't feel lonely?

 

[NeonDrunes3]

I was called selfish by the one family member I only speak to for wanting the end. Didn't end well, he had at my door.

 

[DeathSweetDeath]

Unfortunately suicide is selfish. You are putting your own needs ahead of others. You are hurting other people because it would make you feel better. I've made my piece with the fact my suicide is a selfish decision that will hurt other people. The only one that will benefit in any way is me because my pain will be gone.

That depends on who the person is and what the situation is. Sometimes it's a selfish act, other times it's a selfless act.

 

[emptymiku]

ive always hated this opinion.

society sees suicide as an inherently bad thing. they try to guilt you into not going through with it instead of addressing the societal problems that lead to it.

the thing is, it's selfish of them to put their own feelings above your wellbeing

 

[tomatriste]

speaking for myself .. i almost feel like continuing to live is selfish to those around me and secondarily society at large. i contribute nothing

 

[MonochromeMind]

When I tried to kill myself, my parents called me selfish, and just got mad at me.

It's not selfish. It's selfish for them to keep me here.

 

[Nightingale93]

What's selfish is, for those who actually have power to change the direction of the world, of society into a better path, but instead refuse to do so and keep us trapped in this cruel existence that makes us feel suicidal in the first place.

 

[lpdsvm]

For me it is not selfish. I am sick of being weak and unable to change anything in my life anymore. No one can tell me I am selfish and even if I there were people, they wouldn't be able to help me change my own life.
My own boss is trying to scam me. Yes, I don't care about that and I am trying to dump them, but in the meantime this b#llsh$t affects my wallet and my mental wellbeing.

I think if there were people like that in my life, they would just want me to entertain them or pass the time with them when they are bored. It could be selfish for them to want me back.
I feel like they want to find nice losers that suffer and feel superior about themselves.

youre not selfish, its not selfish to want to leave a place where you never asked to be

Wow. I fully support that. This is what I think too. I just feel better when I read that. Thanks.

 

[MANGIONESHUSBAND]

why would someone say that to me? i told them i wanted to kill myself. they called me selfish. they said i'll just be leaving them alone. why is it selfish? am i selfish?

This is gonna sound like a weird take but I'm an egoist (it's a weird niche political philosophy) so in this philosophy we believe there are no fully altruistic thoughts,ideals, or actions. Even if suicide was selfish. The truth is every decision is selfish. Selfish decisions are normal, healthy,and ok. Also if suicide rates correlated with selfishness the highest suicides would all be in like the Bible Belt because none of this fuckers have ever felt empathy for anyone in their lives! You aren't doing anything wrong bro

 

[rainatthebusstop]

why would someone say that to me? i told them i wanted to kill myself. they called me selfish. they said i'll just be leaving them alone. why is it selfish? am i selfish?

In a sense? You are choosing to kill yourself which is an action where you prioritise the end of your suffering over the morals of your loved ones.

On the other hand, it is selfish to make someone suffer just because the end of their suffering would make you sad and you've convinced yourself that it's your fault.

There's no altruism here. There's no end to this were one party isn't being selfish, not as long as humans as a whole start to change the moral framework of how suicide is seen. But then again, that framework wouldn't benefit the state or the healthcare system or one of the trillion offer grifts that profit from "suicide bad "

 

[39hatsune]

im so sorry that happened, i had a similar experience

i think if anything, they are the selfish ones for saying that

 

[aRose]

I really don't get why people expound that cliche. It's just as bad as the saying "permanent solution to a temporary problem" when not all problems are temporary at all. It's all about context.
I think people feel more comfortable calling us selfish rather than looking at the true context of our lives and our struggles. It's a lazy rely from an ignorant person.

 

[StryngerX]

For me, i think it depends. For most cases, we have people who care about us, like our company, and will miss us after we go. But that alone, does not make anyone selfish, not us, not then, its not selfish of you want to end your own suffer, its ok to put your needs first. Also not selfish by the others, who just want you to be ok and around.

Now, if you're gonna leave other with debts, a situation where someone would possible do the same from suffer for you lost, or trauma, like, its very common people find somebody hanging in a rope, this would traumatize most people for life. This would be selfish in my point of view. Thats why when/if i have to, when i ctb, i plan to leave everyone in good condition, will move away, cut contact, eventually they will move on and acept that im no longer part of their lives, and then, just then i'll find a remote place where possible no one will ever found my body, and go away in peace.

Dont get me wrong, im not judging anyone method, you gotta do what you gotta do, but try to be as smooth as possible on this, remember this can afect other to.

 

[thelostautistic]

I don't think you are selfish. People often call us selfish in order to make us feel guilty about our feelings. I had a teacher of mine tell me the same thing and it still hurts ( I left school years ago ). I just remind myself that the people saying these things probably haven't been our shoes so they don't understand the pain we're in