Suicidal Pascal’s Wager

[HanginAround]

If I fail to go through with CTB, I will continue to suffer.

If I succeed at CTB, then I will suffer no more.

 

[shoganai]

Hate it when people say "You shouldn't do it because it's final. You won't have a chance to get better." The goal is to stop the suffering, no? We've already considered the finality of ctb

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

Hate it when people say "You shouldn't do it because it's final. You won't have a chance to get better." The goal is to stop the suffering, no? We've already considered the finality of ctb

For me, it's not just to stop the suffering, but knowing that there is no hope that this suffering will pass and will indeed get worse. I am middle-aged, I have learned that most things do pass given enough time, I have learned through experience to ride it out and that I am capable of doing so, but I've also learned what will truly not pass and is truly insurmountable. Sometimes coping skills are not enough, sometimes ctb is the coping.

 

[shoganai]

For me, it's not just to stop the suffering, but knowing that there is no hope that this suffering will pass and will indeed get worse. I am middle-aged, I have learned that most things do pass given enough time, I have learned through experience to ride it out and that I am capable of doing so, but I've also learned what will truly not pass and is truly insurmountable. Sometimes coping skills are not enough, sometimes ctb is the coping.

I think I understand what you mean. I can "cope" with depression (keep myself functioning [for now]), but do I really want to suffer for the majority of my life just because it *may* get a bit better? This isn't situational, it's deep-rooted and will take years upon years to improve.

It's really not worth it to me. I feel like there's no hope for me either.

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

I think I understand what you mean. I can "cope" with depression (keep myself functioning [for now]), but do I really want to suffer for the majority of my life just because it *may* get a bit better? This isn't situational, it's deep-rooted and will take years upon years to improve.

It's really not worth it to me. I feel like there's no hope for me either.

That's not quite what I meant, because if it can improve then it is situational. But perhaps a more accurate descriptor for both our experiences is conditional. All conditions pass. My conditions will only pass when I do. I will not attempt to define your condition or its potential duration. I recognize I am not you and have no way of knowing. I accept that is how you experience and define it, and I accept and respect your right to address it however you choose.

EDIT: And some conditions are unbearable even though they are going to eventually pass. Perhaps that's what you were getting from my previous post.

 

[shoganai]

That's not quite what I meant, because if it can improve then it is situational. But perhaps a more accurate descriptor for both our experiences is conditional. All conditions pass. My conditions will only pass when I do. I will not attempt to define your condition or its potential duration. I recognize I am not you and have no way of knowing. I accept that is how you experience and define it, and I accept and respect your right to address it however you choose.

I'm really sorry, I hope I didn't sound harsh/rude or anything. I only brought up my experience to try and use it as an example.

Guess it's a good thing I said I *thought* I understood instead of assuming I did. Sorry again.

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

I'm really sorry, I hope I didn't sound harsh/rude or anything. I only brought up my experience to try and use it as an example.

Guess it's a good thing I said I *thought* I understood instead of assuming I did. Sorry again.

Not at all! It was a conversation. I said something, you responded, I clarified. I found it helpful.

I make a conscious effort to respect others' boundaries and autonomy and to not define them, but rather allow them to define themselves. Perhaps it came across that I was correcting you when I was actually trying to honor you. If so, I'm glad you said something so that I could clarify that, too.

 

[LadyAlastor]

There shouldn't be a wager when it comes down to suicide that being said enjoy this image.

 

[Moon Flower]

There shouldn't be a wager when it comes down to suicide that being said enjoy this image.

Is that Homura?

 

[WhyIsLife56]

Is that Homura?

It certainly looks like it

 

[easywayout]

There shouldn't be a wager when it comes down to suicide that being said enjoy this image.

The angles all wrong, she's gonna end up with no face. :P

 

[LadyAlastor]

The angles all wrong, she's gonna end up with no face. :P

I know I said the same damn thing

 

[shoganai]

Not at all! It was a conversation. I said something, you responded, I clarified. I found it helpful.

I make a conscious effort to respect others' boundaries and autonomy and to not define them, but rather allow them to define themselves. Perhaps it came across that I was correcting you when I was actually trying to honor you. If so, I'm glad you said something so that I could clarify that, too.

Thank you. I was really tired and got self-conscious. And it's great that you're patiently clarifying and providing autonomy.