squeezing your neck just by pleasure

[suicidesheep31]

Hi,
Everything is alright in my life currently but I still have the urge to "self-harm" by drinking and squeeze my neck with a wire.
I feel the power of taking my life or just avoiding myself to breath or just liking to feel my head in this state.
That's weird, isn't it?
Just afraid to feel happy and that people reject me because I am proud/ happy.
I prefer to be sad. Nobody envy someone sad...

Does someone like to squeeze his/her/its necks?
Are you somehow afraid to be happy?

 

[fox_wannabe]

I feel like being sad is being me. I just cannot be happy in prolonged periods of time without finding reasons to be sad again.
I do not squeeze my neck but I really want to try to hang myself again. I tried It 4 times already and last time I almost passed out and died. But It feels really good to have your blood flow to brain restricted. It is something new and very dangerous. I am afraid, or rather I know I might get into it too much and die.

Gosh I want to put noose on. Everything is "alright" except I am hopelessly alone and depressed and I cannot move after being treated like shit by the world.

Edit: Also if they reject you because you are happy it means they are not your real friends, Maybe you are not lost cause <3

 

[Jumping_realms]

Just afraid to feel happy and that people reject me because I am proud/ happy.
I prefer to be sad. Nobody envy someone sad...

From the outcome of your feelings from both experiences, then you may as well do what you love. Being happy/proud.

In any case you may as well do what you love.

 

[deleted]

i do that too i like feeling close to death brings me a feeling of peace, last time my nose was bleeding

 

[Gustav Hartmann]

It sounds to me like you are masochistic and into erotic asphyxiation. I is not weird at all, it is a grace because it helps you to enjoy the inevitable, your death.

 

[suicidesheep31]

@Gustav Hartmann
Well if we look at the definition of erotic asphyxiation, I only do the asphyxiation part and not the erotic part XD
I do agree I am a maso ;p
but only myself can hurt myself, OK!!!!!!

@Jumping_realms I don't know what I love.... I just feel more myself when I am sad. It is more comfortable for me.

@fox_wannabe Indeed, it gives me a sense of control I guess to do that. And they were indeed not real friends...
I have some red spots on my neck from yesterday. Hopefully not a red line
I might restart today...

 

[moths]

ever since i first started "practicing" hanging myself i realized i liked the feelingg of cutting off blood 2 my brain, its not a sexual thing @ all, not like autoerotic asphyxiation its just a feeling of happiness peace like nothing matters even though it only lasts less thana minute