someone to talk to

[Intelligent_Panic99]

I have 117 days until the decided upon time for ctb. (Several reasons.) But I just don't know I can make it that long. I have literally everything I need to do it right now. But I just wish - I really wish - I could talk to someone (literally anyone) about it. I just need perspective but all I will get is judgment and the belief that they know better than me about my life.

Also, I don't want to them to think I am just looking for attention. I've lost everyone I can trust - they've abandoned me.

Edit to add: I mean someone IRL, I am so grateful for this place to talk about

 

[FuneralCry]

I do wish that we lived in a world where suicide is not so stigmatised and we could talk openly about our plans to leave this world. I'm sorry for all the suffering you are going through. I know that this life can be unbearable when you are desperate to leave. I wish you the best in whatever happens.

 

[MegaGordo]

Similar periods. There's something I read abt called "Biological Tides Theory" that alludes to the pull of our neuro-chemicals, hormones, etc. just like the ocean tides. Low and high, low and high. I also keep in mind that I won't do anything rash in a low mood. I want to feel good, not cruddy, during my exit. I want to remember the sensory details of my special loved one, nature, animals, trees, plants, music playing that I love...that's how I wish to transition. That's my take, at least. But I knw the feeling of desperation and the what-the-fuck attitude of getting the deed done now! Depends on circumstance, I guess, to a great extent. I was much more in dire straits for a prolonged period a while ago. But now, I'm just a medium high grade dude at the bus stop.