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sm20

Student
May 5, 2021
132
Maybe it's just because my problems are mostly physical but even though death is an ok option for mee neutral at worst I'm still terrified. It's like I can't register that my life is over because I can see so easily how it would be good if my health was better but it won't completely be better likely for 10 years. Some parts get worse, some stay the same, some improve, but all change is slow.
 
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Reactions: ohangiedontyouweep, Beachedwhale, RedHarlequin and 1 other person
WornOutLife

WornOutLife

マット
Mar 22, 2020
7,183
I know that dilemma perfectly.
Check this thread out. It really helped me.

https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/dont-be-afraid-of-death.47413/
 
greyhound

greyhound

Arcanist
Oct 8, 2020
471
I'm in the same boat. Ill and basically at my breaking point of what I can take. Yet I have loved ones and activities that I enjoy. Scared of the process of dying, yet it's all I can think about as a way to end the pain. Yet the thought of ctb scares me so in a state of perpetual anxiety. Not the best way to spend last few months. I envy those for whom death just comes quickly and unexpectedly.
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
48,676
I know what it feels like to be trapped in this world. I'm scared of the actual ctb act itself, It comforts me the thought of no longer being alive and I know it is the option that I want. I would love to just pass away in my sleep.
 
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xrafinha

xrafinha

Member
Mar 29, 2021
87
I have a health problem that came suddenly. It is terrible. Still, all my family members are perfecly health and I got two granmothers with 84 and 91 years old and they are doing super fine.

I got a family who loves me, a GF who loves me, I love her. Still, that problem of mine took my will to live altoguether. In reality, I don't want to die, just want to be health again, and I won't be so I'm a super tormented soul.

Point being, I got what you are saying.
 
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Reactions: greyhound
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lonerclown666

Mage
Dec 1, 2020
540
I dont have fear about dying i have more fear about living i am a true coward i lived as a neet for many years now because i dont wanted to deal with life now i want to ctb to end everything
 
B

Beachedwhale

Mage
Mar 3, 2021
526
I can relate. I have a health problem that I've had for years but didn't know I had until recently. Meanwhile my life has fallen apart because of it and other issues. It's really tragic because there is so much in my life that I wanted to do and want to do, and I am trying to fix this problem so I can start putting my life back together and get a career, but the extreme fatigue it gives me is making everything difficult, and I am becoming more and more desperate.
 

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