Reason

[JuzoXIII]

Sigh. I used to have so many reasons to kill myself. Like life is just bashing onto me. Now, well idk. It's just that instead of having so many reason to die, i have no reason to live. I feel empty. I mean the feeling of being numb and empty comes now and then but i just don't seem to find any reason to live. I feel my entire existence is just a failure and burden. like I'm not needed anymore. Sigh. im just fucked up. 8 Years through this and I'm still the same with no progress to die or to live.

 

[KLUF]

You feel this way not because you have no reason to live. It's because you have no reason to have a reason to live. Why should you anyway? You didn't ask for your birth.
Sigh, I know the struggle, not knowing what to do...

Gonna be straightforward, I see 3 ways out of it:

1. Finding purpose (actually not hard as it sounds, for example learning a new language to meet new interesting people)
2. Living an average life until dying of old age
3. CTB

Good luck!