Pointless

[PoisonedJuliet]

Has anyone ever felt in between sad and happy where you just feel like life is pointless? Like it wouldn't matter if you were gone and I hate to say it but you just get bored and tired of being alive.

 

[Lostandfound7]

Yes! I was TOTALLY there a few wks ago..I am a lil better, yet not fully..But I feel u 110%!!!..Just tired...

 

[Dromides]

Nearly everyday.

 

[bigtasty]

100%. I can never seem to get out of the cycle, anything I do to make myself happy or at least a little bit satisfied doesn't last long

 

[stevieu]

Yeah. Nothing seems to make me happy anymore. Pretending to look happy in front of people gets so tiring :(

It's like an ongoing apathetic numbness.

 

[PoisonedJuliet]

100%. I can never seem to get out of the cycle, anything I do to make myself happy or at least a little bit satisfied doesn't last long

Exactly or even if I do something that should make me happy I just feel nothing

Yeah. Nothing seems to make me happy anymore. Pretending to look happy in front of people gets so tiring :(

It's like an ongoing apathetic numbness.

I'm still in school so I'm surrounded by people who don't understand and it's physically and mentally exhausting keeping on a fake smile

Yes! I was TOTALLY there a few wks ago..I am a lil better, yet not fully..But I feel u 110%!!!..Just tired...

Even a small improvement is something to celebrate!

 

[Lostandfound7]

Even a small improvement is something to celebrate!

[/QUOTE]
Yes ur right..but it's so hard to celebrate since only a fraction of my issues have improved. I guess I should celebrate the small victories..ty for the reminder

 

[TimeToBiteTheDust]

Has anyone ever felt in between sad and happy where you just feel like life is pointless? Like it wouldn't matter if you were gone and I hate to say it but you just get bored and tired of being alive.

Hours ago I was having a bath and was thinking "What the hell is all this? This has no sense". I don't care if I die today. Every night when I go to bed I tell myself: "Remember all this is temporary. Life is temporary. You'll die one day. "

 

[Dead beat dad]

Has anyone ever felt in between sad and happy where you just feel like life is pointless? Like it wouldn't matter if you were gone and I hate to say it but you just get bored and tired of being alive.

The line from the song 'Ol Man River' sums this up quite succinctly for me:
"Tired of living
Scared of dying..."

It is a conundrum.
Bless you brother and may peace be with you.
DBD

 

[Deathbydemo]

Every single second of every single day. Nothing holds any meaning anymore. Everything fades into insignificance in my mind except for how to successfully end my life and minimise the impact it will have on my family.

 

[Lady Lazarus 2020]

Yeah. Nothing seems to make me happy anymore. Pretending to look happy in front of people gets so tiring :(

It's like an ongoing apathetic numbness.

i have to go pretend to look happy in 2 hours at my sisters going away party and i am already soooo tired at just the thought. omg what am i going to do? i DONT want to go!

 

[bigtasty]

i have to go pretend to look happy in 2 hours at my sisters going away party and i am already soooo tired at just the thought. omg what am i going to do? i DONT want to go!

Fake being sick? That's my plan to get out of anything short notice

 

[calendulo]

Pointless, what word so sad. Sounds deeply sad. And when someone writes it, that last s looks like a deep death rattle, like if you were exhausted waiting the end.

 

[Sweet Release]

Yep, I am so world weary.
There are a few things that still give me pleasure but non of that lasts long.

A large part of it is that I just don't see a future for myself anymore so instead I am just going through the daily motions.
On the plus side I am not anxious or afraid anymore because I honestly don't have much to lose.
Have ordered SN online and I genuinely won't miss my life at all.

Every single second of every single day. Nothing holds any meaning anymore. Everything fades into insignificance in my mind except for how to successfully end my life and minimise the impact it will have on my family.

I'm hearing you.

 

[PoisonedJuliet]

A large part of it is that I just don't see a future for myself anymore so instead I am just going through the daily motions.

I know. It feels like I'm a robot just programmed to get through each day. Sometimes it's so bad I feel like I'm underwater. I live with a constant feeling of derealization. It feels like I'm not human sometimes...

 

[Sweet Release]

I know. It feels like I'm a robot just programmed to get through each day. Sometimes it's so bad I feel like I'm underwater. I live with a constant feeling of derealization. It feels like I'm not human sometimes...

I can definitely relate to that.
Very rarely I actually cry and it feels so good because I am actually feeling something again and don't seem so dull and lifeless.
But most of the time I just feel nothing at all; no joy or sadness just nothing.

 

[PoisonedJuliet]

I can definitely relate to that.
Very rarely I actually cry and it feels so good because I am actually feeling something again and don't seem so dull and lifeless.
But most of the time I just feel nothing at all; no joy or sadness just nothing.

Same!!! I just don't feel which can sometimes be the worst "feeling" in the world. Lifeless and dull are the perfect words to describe it. I'm a very sensitive person and cry over insignificant things but I always scare myself when I can't cry

 

[AlreadyGone]

Due to constant disappointments in life, nothing makes me happy anymore. I am constantly reminded of all the times things would look like they are heading in the right direction to come crashing down. I will no longer be fooled by life anymore and I am simply tired of playing the game.

 

[sadgirl2002]

All the time. I was never attached to this life, it's nothing to me. Everyone is so consumed by this world and its affairs, they spend their lives doing such things which I see as pointless and boring. I was always beyond this life, it's a deception in itself. Death was always the real thing for me.

 

[Sweet Release]

Yeah. Nothing seems to make me happy anymore. Pretending to look happy in front of people gets so tiring :(

It's like an ongoing apathetic numbness.

Can't put on a brave face all the time.
I often smile out of a sense of social obligation but its so empty I think people can see straight through it.

 

[PoisonedJuliet]

Can't put on a brave face all the time.
I often smile out of a sense of social obligation but its so empty I think people can see straight through it.

Yeah, when I smile and put on my "mask" my friends can see right through it. My eyes look empty because I am empty

 

[Sweet Release]

Due to constant disappointments in life, nothing makes me happy anymore. I am constantly reminded of all the times things would look like they are heading in the right direction to come crashing down. I will no longer be fooled by life anymore and I am simply tired of playing the game.

I'm hearing you.
Yeah those memories of better times and how I thought everything was now looking up really mess with me too.
For me its that I am reminded of all the times I screwed up and how my life could have been so different if I only knew better.
I am sorry life has screwed you over so bad, sounds like its really drained you.

Yeah, when I smile and put on my "mask" my friends can see right through it. My eyes look empty because I am empty

Aw jeez man!
Well if anything then please know that you are not alone with that.
Hope you find real happiness again.