Venting One step closer to the grave

[Squiddy]

I'm now one step closer to the grave (kind of). I bought a scale a few minutes ago for my method. I haven't 100% decided to go, but it's nice to have my method completed and ready to go should I need to make my exit.

My mom threatened me once again last night to kick me out all because I didn't acknowledge her as I was in a rush to go to work and tired (and she says she also wants me out because she's scared of me because of the "tone of my voice." I have a monotone voice, but it gets more monotone when I'm stressed or tired so idk). I'm trying to find a new place to live, but it's hard. I don't want a random roommate because I'm afraid they'll steal my stuff and when I asked a few of my friends, they said sure, but I don't think they were serious about moving out so I could very well be homeless by next month and when that day comes, I might finally be ready. I'm tired of the endless suffering and people telling me it gets better. It hasn't for me. It only has gotten worse. I'm trying my best to improve, but no luck so far

 

[8evergo]

I know that one hesitates to get his ctb out for whatever reason, but it is getting worse from day to day a really good serious CTB partner is exactly the right thing for you both since then more determined to start the beautiful CTB you had hoped for

 

[FuneralCry]

I can imagine that it must be a relief just having the option of a way to exit. I'm sorry that you have suffered so much in life, it sounds tiring being in that situation and I know that it is hard to carry on when things just get worse. I hope that in whatever happens, you find relief from what you are going through.