Help One last larp?

[iwashere]

Hmmmm likely not a good idea if you were to ask me. But alas. One last larp. Listen. We do South of France. We use AMEX points to fly to Nice, France on Delta One. Stay in Cannes 3 days where we drink Aeperol Spritz at the Carlton Beach club, day trip to Monaco.

Stay w me….

We then voyage to Antibes and we stay for 2 days… drink a lot of wine…

Train.

Nice, France. We park here for the finality of the trip. Day trip to St Tropez one day.

Return home, it's done.

What are the problems here?!?!??

I don't have enough time to make this happen for the reasonable season. Meaning I'm gonna have to wait until NEXT YEAR to do this. Is it even worth it??? It's kinda like, just get the gun, get it over with, what are we doing?! Kinda like, "oh okay, you lost the plot and you're not being serious anymore. Piece of shit!" like I kinda don't want to do this anymore. But like one final larp bro I have tooooooo. This pics on the boat would be insane…… but at the same time it's like who's gonna care bc i'm gonna be dead but that's also the thing…. it's gonna be like "brooo she was just in south of france, why would she do thissss" so it adds to the shock factor…( if ur confused about my demented thinking refer to one of like my first posts on this website

Guys if there is another youtube video essay they're gonna screenshot this post and say "The twisted website poisoned her young mind into thinking she needed to ask for permission before she took her life "

 

[smok]

ur kinda spitting rn, might give ts a go

 

[iwashere]

ur kinda spitting rn, might give ts a go

for the one time!! but i feel like after south of france it's gonna be "let's go somewhere else!!" instead of making some shit shake

 

[Scaredycat]

You might as well as try everything before u die

 

[CarbonBased]

I haven't been following your story but it seems like you at least have enough money to afford the trip and enough mental health to actually enjoy it. That's probably not a very common situation on this forum. What am I missing?

 

[iwashere]

I haven't been following your story but it seems like you at least have enough money to afford the trip and enough mental health to actually enjoy it. That's probably not a very common situation on this forum. What am I missing?

no, and no! i don't have enough money at all to do this trip which is why i'd have to do it next year (i'm working on a 22 year old CNA budget lolololol) i have to save for over a year to make this trip enjoyable. which leads to me asking if YOU guys would think it's worth it, because i don't know if i can last another year because i suddenly decided i wanted to larp as a billionaire in france for 2 weeks before i shoot myself in a parking lot.

essentially i do this a lot. first it was tokyo, then i went to tokyo and came back and all i had to do was buy a gun, but then i was like "omg ur bday is in three months… u have to go do something for ur bday!!" both trips ended w me crying in my hotel room alone debating if i should jump out of the window, so i know how these trips ends. it's a cycle of "omg new shiny toy!! this will keep my mind off things for awhile," then being miserable but remembering: "don't worry, you're literally just working to pay off ur trip, then you're gonna go, and then you get to come back and die! it's all going to be worth it!! we just have to 'marinate' the grand finale" (if that makes sense) and then i come back even more miserable than before i left but then i remember some other fucking country i want to see. but atp if i keep doing this im never going to reach my goal which is why i came and i asked like Is it even worth it to wait around do all this shit to go to France when i know how this is gonna end anyways?!

 

[CarbonBased]

no, and no! i don't have enough money at all to do this trip which is why i'd have to do it next year (i'm working on a 22 year old CNA budget lolololol) i have to save for over a year to make this trip enjoyable. which leads to me asking if YOU guys would think it's worth it, because i don't know if i can last another year because i suddenly decided i wanted to larp as a billionaire in france for 2 weeks before i shoot myself in a parking lot.

essentially i do this a lot. first it was tokyo, then i went to tokyo and came back and all i had to do was buy a gun, but then i was like "omg ur bday is in three months… u have to go do something for ur bday!!" both trips ended w me crying in my hotel room alone debating if i should jump out of the window, so i know how these trips ends. it's a cycle of "omg new shiny toy!! this will keep my mind off things for awhile," then being miserable but remembering: "don't worry, you're literally just working to pay off ur trip, then you're gonna go, and then you get to come back and die! it's all going to be worth it!! we just have to 'marinate' the grand finale" (if that makes sense) and then i come back even more miserable than before i left but then i remember some other fucking country i want to see. but atp if i keep doing this im never going to reach my goal which is why i came and i asked like Is it even worth it to wait around do all this shit to go to France when i know how this is gonna end anyways?!

Right. I guess I spoke too soon. If you ask me, though, I wouldn't do any of that. I don't think I would enjoy it anyway. I don't know your situation, but it kinda seems like all this larping business is your way of delaying something that your subconscious doesn't want to happen in a way that seems kinda rational if you don't think about it too hard. You might want to stop to seriously consider your own motivations, and I doubt that any of us on this forum can help you with that. In any case, I wish you the best of luck with whatever you decide. Take care

 

[LeDentistPenguin]

hell yeah i love larping

 

[iwashere]

hell yeah i love larping

RIGHT! my mind changes so much though whatever decision i choose i know i wont be satisfied/the happiest ive ever been regardless. it's the weirdest most confusing paradox ever. ik im coming from a super privileged place so at the very least i should be grateful but damn i can't shake this feeling

 

[Silva13]

Well I live in France and will be happy to make you a visit if I can borrow your gun right after for myself ?