Ok i got a new job

[NothingElseMatters]

And i feel like shit, im so afraid of having to pretend im happy, get up of bed every single day to work hard, thats not something i have wished.

 

[WornOutLife]

I can see you got the guts to go for that job you mentioned some days ago.
I'm sorry you're having a hard time dealing with it. Pretending is exhausting.

 

[NothingElseMatters]

I can see you got the guts to go for that job you mentioned some days ago.
I'm sorry you're having a hard time dealing with it. Pretending is exhausting.

Why do we have to face things like that? Just why

 

[WornOutLife]

Why do we have to face things like that? Just why

I think the main problem with us is that we find "normal life" pointless.
I mean, sure, having more money and finding love would make us happy for some time but what are the real goals of life in the end?
A family? Getting married? Working until you're grey an old and die at your 80s?

That is not enough for me. I wanna understand the universe, how something can come from nothing, I just wanna know what the hell we really are.

 

[TotallyIsolated]

I was too depressed to work for about 2 years but I've been working again for nearly a year now. There were times when I thought I was going to relapse and things got rocky but overall it actually turned out ok. I didnt tell my new boss everything but I told them I have depression and they've been pretty cool about it.

I know its tough, but give yourself a chance. You can make it.

And congrats on getting the job

 

[Disco Biscuit]

I think the main problem with us is that we find "normal life" pointless.
I mean, sure, having more money and finding love would make us happy for some time but what are the real goals of life in the end?
A family? Getting married? Working until you're grey an old and die at your 80s?

That is not enough for me. I wanna understand the universe, how something can come from nothing, I just wanna know what the hell we really are.

Hi Matt! You're infinite love and universal creative consciousness expressing itself in physical form. x

 

[WornOutLife]

Hi Matt! You're infinite love and universal creative consciousness expressing itself in physical form. x

Aww thank you so much for your words. It's an honor to have you in this community.
I still have lots to work on and will probably be suicidal until the day I die but I will always try to help because you all have helped me lots!

 

[GreenTree]

Good luck and well done

 

[Trisolaris]

Maybe it will do you good.

 

[BeansOfRequirement]

Fellas are acting like they're in recovery...

This is basically how I felt during the times when I worked/studied, the same pain and suicidality but now you feel pressure to put in effort and burn energy you don't feel you have. No motivation, don't need the money, just want to die, have to be around normies, etc.

I haven't managed to cope with it yet, but one strategy I used was to remind myself that it's not really worse moment-to-moment to work rather than sit at home and be depressed. Maybe that can help you a bit, idk.