Off this planet

[ojinzo]

As the clock ticks and I get closer and closer to my package of SN and meto arriving, the more I grow enthused to leave this planet. Over the next few weeks I have to put on the best performance of my life.

This weekend I have to suffer being around family, pretending all is well and shit. I haven't shaved or got a haircut in a month but I have to do it today so my family doesn't suspect a thing.

I smiled and cracked a forced joke with my evil landlord because I don't want my packages to disappear...

Honestly, I feel solemn. Each day the fear of drinking the cocktail of death gets weaker and weaker. I want it so bad. I actually started listening to music again. I thought it would make me feel bad about dying but instead it's been a nostalgic reminiscence in what I'm leaving behind.

SaSu has been a great resource for me tethering my will to succeed in ctb and I'm got damn glad. For years, I've been talked out of it, persuaded otherwise. But SaSu is the only resource that helped reinforce my resolve to die! It's not a bad thing, either. Frek those who think this is a bad place that encourages one to do something they don't want to do. I want this and I'm grateful I had something that helped me gain the strength to do it!

I'm ready to leave this body. C'est bon, c'est bon

 

[jodes2]

I want reasons to CTB too. It's just easier that way

 

[thebunny]

i hope your package arrives without any problem. i've felt the same way when i was waiting to get my little ctb kit., and now that i've got it, i've never felt so giddy. this life isn't really the best, but i'm glad you were able to find some things worth remembering. also, i'm glad you found comfort and help here in sasu! i hope you find the peace you deserve soon and i wish you well

 

[FuneralCry]

I do wish that we lived in a world where we could be open about our plans to leave, and people wouldn't have to pretend around others, instead they would have no choice but to accept our decision. It must be really tiring knowing that you have to hide your feelings from them. Suicide really shouldn't be so stigmatised as after all there is nothing wrong with wanting to leave. Death will come for us all one day eventually so we deserve to have some control over when we exit. I wish you the best with your plans and I hope that you find freedom from all suffering.