Me venting can somebody listen or give advice

[anotherlastchance]

where do I begin
It has now been six months since I left a mental institution, I live in sheltered housing, it is the first time in my life that I have a place for myself
I could officially stay here for 3 years
but I have the feeling that they want me out of here as quickly as possible. I do daytime activities, namely woodworking. I think it is a fun daytime activity and I try to learn as much as possible so that I can perhaps work as a carpenter or furniture maker in the future. but I have the feeling that my personal supervisor wants me to find work as quickly as possible and then let me live independently or, in short, they want to get rid of me
Why? Day care is officially mandatory, but of the 35 residents, only 8 actually meet the requirements. In addition, there is no one who actually works here or is expected to do this, but this is expected of me, which I find stressful. Maybe they don't understand that. After a life full of chaos, I have a little bit of stability and certainty for the first time in my life
I know that my upstairs neighbor hates me
I do not know why
He's being nice but I know he doesn't mean it
I suspect that he complains a lot about me behind my back, although this is often unjustified
it's almost as if he wants me to not follow the rules or cause a nuisance so that he can complain about it, which also makes me feel like I'm a burden to him and so I feel guilty in some way
In any case, I think they want me out of here as quickly as possible and I can't handle that stress. I do want to work in the future, but I need to be able to think about this calmly.
In any case, the pressure I experience makes me think more and more about suicide and I don't dare to talk about this because I think they would want me to leave completely, oh well, I just had to say this.

 

[derpyderpins]

where do I begin
It has now been six months since I left a mental institution, I live in sheltered housing, it is the first time in my life that I have a place for myself
I could officially stay here for 3 years
but I have the feeling that they want me out of here as quickly as possible. I do daytime activities, namely woodworking. I think it is a fun daytime activity and I try to learn as much as possible so that I can perhaps work as a carpenter or furniture maker in the future. but I have the feeling that my personal supervisor wants me to find work as quickly as possible and then let me live independently or, in short, they want to get rid of me
Why? Day care is officially mandatory, but of the 35 residents, only 8 actually meet the requirements. In addition, there is no one who actually works here or is expected to do this, but this is expected of me, which I find stressful. Maybe they don't understand that. After a life full of chaos, I have a little bit of stability and certainty for the first time in my life

Very tough to give advice without being there. These people do this work and know more than we would, and they have way more information. It sounds to me like they think you are doing better than other people there, which is why they may prioritize making you leave. I'm sure they want everyone to find work and leave as quickly as possible, but will only pressure you when they thinkg you're ready. You have to let them know you're struggling if it's in a way they can't see.

I know that my upstairs neighbor hates me
I do not know why
He's being nice but I know he doesn't mean it
I suspect that he complains a lot about me behind my back, although this is often unjustified
it's almost as if he wants me to not follow the rules or cause a nuisance so that he can complain about it, which also makes me feel like I'm a burden to him and so I feel guilty in some way
In any case, I think they want me out of here as quickly as possible and I can't handle that stress. I do want to work in the future, but I need to be able to think about this calmly.
In any case, the pressure I experience makes me think more and more about suicide and I don't dare to talk about this because I think they would want me to leave completely, oh well, I just had to say this.

It's fine to vent. I'd say just realize that he most likely has issues of his own. You need to focus on you. If his complaints are unjustified, you shouldn't worry. I would just be polite and otherwise try to ignore him.