Bedrock48
Dreadful damage, dreadful destiny
- Feb 1, 2021
- 540
I played chicken with a couple cars yesterday. Not the smartest thing to do, I'll admit that but feeling so numb and empty for so long was driving me crazy.
A car sped towards me with their lights on. It was a little addictive watching them draw closer and I'm honestly still a little sad they didn't hit me. Looking back now I realise I did not care for who was in charge of that car. Its funny cause that's one thing that draws me away from trains, the responsibility of somebody else's feelings in my actions. Didn't even register last night.
I'm tired and sore from the long walk and the come down from mania. Pushing the limits because I'm forcing myself to live for others. Somethings gotta give soon because I know this isn't sustainable.
Looking forward to the end but still trying to make a life worth living. One where I'm not just tied to the guilt of being a puppet to please others. I've got to figure the right thing out.
A car sped towards me with their lights on. It was a little addictive watching them draw closer and I'm honestly still a little sad they didn't hit me. Looking back now I realise I did not care for who was in charge of that car. Its funny cause that's one thing that draws me away from trains, the responsibility of somebody else's feelings in my actions. Didn't even register last night.
I'm tired and sore from the long walk and the come down from mania. Pushing the limits because I'm forcing myself to live for others. Somethings gotta give soon because I know this isn't sustainable.
Looking forward to the end but still trying to make a life worth living. One where I'm not just tied to the guilt of being a puppet to please others. I've got to figure the right thing out.
