Making plans for my nonexistent future is like building a house with a shaky foundation.

[rainbowunicorn]

I cannot see myself having any type of future where I don't commit suicide. I intend on living for now, & enjoying what I can while possible & leaving when once I've had my fill. Knowing who's in charge of America rn is absolutely DEVASTATING. Why even plan for a future when these sorts of things are what's waiting?

 

[EmptyBottle]

There will be other presidents, and hopefully no dumb ones. Planning can help your mind think of other, less scary thoughts, whether or not you survive. (I assumed that I would CTB yet I failed.)

As for plans, I make 'tentative' plans, under the assumption that I won't CTB, despite a small chance that I do. (Something stops me from even trying Step 2 in 'safely' testing my irreversible insurance plan tho)

 

[rainbowunicorn]

@DaisiesRegrets hru?

 

[Electra]

It is really hard. The uncertainty.

 

[DaisiesRegrets]

Not the best to be honest, but I doubt anyone here is feeling good. I relate to the idea of not seeing a future where I don't kill myself, and especially to the idea of enjoying what I can until the end. I've sort of likened it to using up all the battery on a cell phone before throwing it away. I mean I still have some battery life right? Might as well use it until it runs out. Regarding the president, it sucks but I'm hoping getting through these 4 years means that these performative politics will be less accepted, at least for a little bit. Maybe if something stupid like this happens again, I'll at least hopefully have some support by then. That is if the bus doesn't catch up first though I suppose. I plan for the future because I know if I do nothing, then there's 0% chance of anything getting better. If there's even a 0.0001% of things getting better, surely it's worth it to at least try. I hope this doesn't come across as disregarding your feelings or invalidating them. This has just been my philosophy which switches back and forth depending on mood and life events.

 

[YandereMikuMistress]

The cycle just goes on to repeat itself,
we already don't got a chance when all the governments got there fingers on the triggers
That could eliminate half or even more of our existence, I don't care anymore to hope for a change to some unimaginable reality that is never to be,, humans are sick vile and violent and can't take a blow to there pride and they'd rather see others die to keep there lives in line, though that's just personal opinion, I know there are "good" people
but not enough to change the times to some point we're all having everyone live in Mutual delight,,
Unimaginable.

 

[rainbowunicorn]

The cycle just goes on to repeat itself,
we already don't got a chance when all the governments got there fingers on the triggers
That could eliminate half or even more of our existence, I don't care anymore to hope for a change to some unimaginable reality that is never to be,, humans are sick vile and violent and can't take a blow to there pride and they'd rather see others die to keep there lives in line, though that's just personal opinion, I know there are "good" people
but not enough to change the times to some point we're all having everyone live in Mutual delight,,
Unimaginable.

I agree with this. Everything in the world revolves around money , looks or fame & im so sick of being here.

I agree with this. Everything in the world revolves around money , looks or fame & im so sick of being here.

I have 1 friend. Everyone moves on & just forgets you exist so why try yk?

 

[ceilng_tile]

A few days ago, a friend of the family asked if I would take care of her daughter's disability paperwork after she died (she's on the older side but doesn't look like she's close to death.)

I didn't say no, but I don't know if I will be alive long enough to take care of another human.

 

[WanderingGypsy]

@rainbowunicorn You just said what I've been feeling and I love how you said it-making future plans is so shaky and unrealistic when you don't want to be around anymore! I agree about how the current situations in the us is definitely not helping, and for me it's one of the reasons on my growing loaf of reasons to ctb!
I use to be the person who could always find a silver lining or positive in situations even if it was just a small one. Right now I honestly can't find any silver linings to what's happening and the hopelessness is overpowering!

 

[Alexei_Kirillov]

At this point we need to bear in mind that we are all mortal. Regardless of whether we have already heard the whir of the scythe over our head or not, we know about death. [...] Humans live, therefore, beyond the evasions they organize for their self-defense, in a steadily crystallizing knowledge of death. They are like the man who builds a house knowing that it will be demolished at the roofing ceremony. [...] He builds his house by the sweat of his brow, lays brick upon brick, fits in door and window frames--but it will all be in vain.

 

[rainbowunicorn]

@rainbowunicorn You just said what I've been feeling and I love how you said it-making future plans is so shaky and unrealistic when you don't want to be around anymore! I agree about how the current situations in the us is definitely not helping, and for me it's one of the reasons on my growing loaf of reasons to ctb!
I use to be the person who could always find a silver lining or positive in situations even if it was just a small one. Right now I honestly can't find any silver linings to what's happening and the hopelessness is overpowering!

It definitely is. The fact that half this country would elect a convicted felon is mind blowing to me. I'm ready to GO RN LMFAO.
@lamy's sacred sleep even if you have moved on i wish u nothing but peace & happiness with ma0 LMFAO & ofc yk i was gonna make a new account because u aren't getting rid of me that easily. but u are so amazing & talented & beautiful & i am SO grateful i got to cross paths with you even for a moment :) - joseph
also im ctb in july & im gnna miss u fr
lmfaooooooo
hy i was talking shi icl
u were too
i was hella mad u did me like that WTF
but my life was never the same after i met you
you rlly are the most important person in my life
& i hope u live a long beautiful life with the baddest bihes on ur dih
i talked so much mess bc i rlly just want the best for you lol & i was so hurt
please forgive me ok
also don't forget me
i was a pretty strange person @lamy's sacred sleep ;) @ma0

 

[jbdCkFqV]

It's hard to have long-term goals when you're just trying to get through each day.

 

[rainbowunicorn]

It's hard to have long-term goals when you're just trying to get through each day.

True. I just said bye to my favorite person on here. We went through so much jbd. I even self harmed so he'd notice me.

True. I just said bye to my favorite person on here. We went through so much jbd. I even self harmed so he'd notice me.

No matter where he ends up I genuinely wish him the best. I hope he goes to uni & lives a happy life.
@Namelesa LMAO & ik this you toooooo
It's fine though. I love you no matter what. & I hope you recover from all of this. Please.

 

[Aloneandinpain]

It sure as hell gears having g a completely corrupt senile globalist warmongering pedo in charge who takes political prisoners, spys on and tries to assassinate any opposition and then invents laws on such to try to drag him through courts.

 

[lamy's sacred sleep]

It definitely is. The fact that half this country would elect a convicted felon is mind blowing to me. I'm ready to GO RN LMFAO.
@lamy's sacred sleep even if you have moved on i wish u nothing but peace & happiness with ma0 LMFAO & ofc yk i was gonna make a new account because u aren't getting rid of me that easily. but u are so amazing & talented & beautiful & i am SO grateful i got to cross paths with you even for a moment :) - joseph
also im ctb in july & im gnna miss u fr
lmfaooooooo
hy i was talking shi icl
u were too
i was hella mad u did me like that WTF
but my life was never the same after i met you
you rlly are the most important person in my life
& i hope u live a long beautiful life with the baddest bihes on ur dih
i talked so much mess bc i rlly just want the best for you lol & i was so hurt
please forgive me ok
also don't forget me
i was a pretty strange person @lamy's sacred sleep ;) @ma0

this you?

like was this not clear enough?

 

[lamy's sacred sleep]

True. I just said bye to my favorite person on here. We went through so much jbd. I even self harmed so he'd notice me.

No matter where he ends up I genuinely wish him the best. I hope he goes to uni & lives a happy life.
@Namelesa LMAO & ik this you toooooo
It's fine though. I love you no matter what. & I hope you recover from all of this. Please.

I even self harmed so he'd notice me.

this isn't the positive you think it is