Making peace with death.

[PrincessInWhite]

Looking for resources and perspectives to help me make peace with death. I've recently been diagnosed with a chronic illness. There are quite a few treatments left for me to try and my mom lived with it normally for years outside of flares, but I need to be prepared for the possibility that nothing will work and it stays like this. The treatment for some people (each case is different) involves a very restrictive diet which I can't live with the rest of my life (NO preservatives, soy, caffeine, coffee, tea, carbonation, chocolate, citrus, tomatoes, condiments...) I'd rather die. There is still hope as many folks can eat normally when out of flares but I've had this flare a month already and they can last months.

LONG STORY SHORT, there's still hope and things I haven't tried. But I want to be able to think about going peacefully without breaking down over being "forced" to leave my life not on my terms. I will miss my dad and partner and little brother so badly. It hurts. But I know to recover I need to work on stress and part of that is radical acceptance of death.

Any advice welcome especially from those suffering physical ailments

 

[WornOutLife]

Well, not a resource here but maybe some advice.

When I wanted to CTB, my only peace with death was thinking that no matter how much I would hurt others, that was THE ONLY WAY OUT for me. I had to be selfish but before ctb, I could try to live my days to the fullest and give my family and all those who I love the best moments in their lives.

Also, what "helped me" was to think about the fact that once dead, I wouldn't exist anymore so I would not care about what happens in this world anymore.

Hope to have helped somehow and I'm really sorry you wanna leave.

Hugs and love,

Matt

 

[BeansOfRequirement]

All I got is "meditation", sorry. I always find it easy to empathize with those suffering from chronic illness, very sorry about this.

 

[fent_dnm27]

Researchers have been using psilocybin to help terminally ill patients overcome their death anxiety for some years now.

I haven't looked into it in some time, but I'd imagine similar results from comparable substances (LSD, DMT, etc.).

 

[Zhontafly]

My simple view is that death IS peace, it's true lasting peace. So for me it's not death that is the problem, it's the problems that come in where our life is concerned: SI, pain, discomfort and suffering you feel before you die, emotions/feelings of bonding, fears of loss and nonexistence are concerned.

It's the human body that is the source of the suffering. Its like a soul cage and it dictates to us what we have to do to survive/live else there are consequences. Once you fully realize and accept that, I find it makes it so very easy to make peace.

 

[lifegoeson]

Is your condition Crohns or ulcerative colitis by any chance ?

 

[yetme]

Looking for resources and perspectives to help me make peace with death. I've recently been diagnosed with a chronic illness. There are quite a few treatments left for me to try and my mom lived with it normally for years outside of flares, but I need to be prepared for the possibility that nothing will work and it stays like this. The treatment for some people (each case is different) involves a very restrictive diet which I can't live with the rest of my life (NO preservatives, soy, caffeine, coffee, tea, carbonation, chocolate, citrus, tomatoes, condiments...) I'd rather die. There is still hope as many folks can eat normally when out of flares but I've had this flare a month already and they can last months.

LONG STORY SHORT, there's still hope and things I haven't tried. But I want to be able to think about going peacefully without breaking down over being "forced" to leave my life not on my terms. I will miss my dad and partner and little brother so badly. It hurts. But I know to recover I need to work on stress and part of that is radical acceptance of death.

Any advice welcome especially from those suffering physical ailments

Hi! same here. chronic illness.

this is a good place to start:

https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/ways-of-making-peace-with-dying.5212/

 

[nowhere2befound]

My advice is to leave this forum immediately and go talk with your mother since she has been through it. I joined forum years after making peace with death and would not recommend joining it before that

 

[PrincessInWhite]

My advice is to leave this forum immediately and go talk with your mother since she has been through it. I joined forum years after making peace with death and would not recommend joining it before that

My mother has severe dementia lmao. My life is bad beyond just my illness.

My simple view is that death IS peace, it's true lasting peace. So for me it's not death that is the problem, it's the problems that come in where our life is concerned: SI, pain, discomfort and suffering you feel before you die, emotions/feelings of bonding, fears of loss and nonexistence are concerned.

It's the human body that is the source of the suffering. Its like a soul cage and it dictates to us what we have to do to survive/live else there are consequences. Once you fully realize and accept that, I find it makes it so very easy to make peace.

I love this

Is your condition Crohns or ulcerative colitis by any chance ?

Interstitial Cystitis actually!

 

[Zhontafly]

@PrincessInWhite Glad the words resonated with you and I am happy to be of assistance.

 

[TooMuchToBear]

I don't know if it could help but have you read this wonderful thread created by Windingdown ? I found it brilliant, eloquently written, soothing and poetic. She ctb using SN soon after that.

https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/ways-of-making-peace-with-dying.5212/

It's the human body that is the source of the suffering. Its like a soul cage and it dictates to us what we have to do to survive/live else there are consequences. Once you fully realize and accept that, I find it makes it so very easy to make peace.

So very well-put! That's often how I feel but couldn't have said it so eloquently. Thank you

 

[Lost Magic]

Because this is all we know and we have a built in survival mechanism no doubt it will be difficult to say goodbye. However, making peace with death is a good thing to do for everybody, not just the ones who want to cbt.