SuicidalPlushie
Member
- Jun 12, 2022
- 41
Hi,
So i been 18 from around month and i'm male with kind of baby face and small body with light brown skin, i gave up on life from years and i lost my battle with depression, BPD and social anxiety and i'm really tired of crying everyday for the past months with feeling isolated and not belonging to this earth and there is no future for me and my first attempt was at 16 and i have now about 20+ attempt with multiple methods, i feel the pressures everyday with high expectations from everyone around me and people has made so much evilness to me, my life was really shitty and had a lot of childhood traumas and pain, tired of chasing things that i will not have and the dreams i had has gone and i feel the time has came to try with a real method to end my pain and have peace from all the chaos around me cause im really worthless and never achieved anything i'm just nothing.
I bought SN from few days and researched about it a lot and i felt it's peaceful and lethal and finally the chance has came to me that's said i have tested it with blood and turned to dark chocolate color immediately as it's 99% pure and i have meto anti-emetic and will follow Stan guide with STAT DOSE but will not try antacid.
I will publish a link for my live streaming on some streaming site here when the time comes and will record my feels, my dreams, have some chit-chat and drink SN and document everything before drinking and after drinking such like the fears, the thoughts and also the taste with symptoms and passing out time and whether it's really peaceful and have no pain, will keep recording for hours with few chatting and will set my computer to shutdown and clear everything automatically when i drink SN after 20 mins or so.
why you are live streaming that? are you not scared of getting spotted?
Note: i still have not talked with admin if this need some edit or some things to do before publishing it here but i believe the admin is kind and will accept this request.
My beautiful and kind soul will find it's place soon.
thanks.
So i been 18 from around month and i'm male with kind of baby face and small body with light brown skin, i gave up on life from years and i lost my battle with depression, BPD and social anxiety and i'm really tired of crying everyday for the past months with feeling isolated and not belonging to this earth and there is no future for me and my first attempt was at 16 and i have now about 20+ attempt with multiple methods, i feel the pressures everyday with high expectations from everyone around me and people has made so much evilness to me, my life was really shitty and had a lot of childhood traumas and pain, tired of chasing things that i will not have and the dreams i had has gone and i feel the time has came to try with a real method to end my pain and have peace from all the chaos around me cause im really worthless and never achieved anything i'm just nothing.
I bought SN from few days and researched about it a lot and i felt it's peaceful and lethal and finally the chance has came to me that's said i have tested it with blood and turned to dark chocolate color immediately as it's 99% pure and i have meto anti-emetic and will follow Stan guide with STAT DOSE but will not try antacid.
I will publish a link for my live streaming on some streaming site here when the time comes and will record my feels, my dreams, have some chit-chat and drink SN and document everything before drinking and after drinking such like the fears, the thoughts and also the taste with symptoms and passing out time and whether it's really peaceful and have no pain, will keep recording for hours with few chatting and will set my computer to shutdown and clear everything automatically when i drink SN after 20 mins or so.
why you are live streaming that? are you not scared of getting spotted?
- i have nothing to lose really and not scared of anything and if police spotted me which i doubt because i would be dead before they reach me, i will not care.
- there is a lot of users here who are afraid and don't have any courage with SN because they don't know the process of it's death because no one seen a SN video just messages from passed people, so i will be their light to show them that SN is a good method.
- i never felt i achieved anything in life so sacrificing my body which is skinny and useless to me to educational purposes and helping others is a noble way to leave for me.
Note: i still have not talked with admin if this need some edit or some things to do before publishing it here but i believe the admin is kind and will accept this request.
My beautiful and kind soul will find it's place soon.
thanks.
