Venting life is so overwhelming

[Death is my goal]

it's so depressing, especially with college.
I feel so overwhelmed yet i feel empty. i do nothing and feel bad about it. everyday is the same. I don't have the power mentally and physically. can't fill the void in my heart. i can't let go of this horrible feeling, this pain, this miserable life. i can't tell anyone or even cry to get things out of my chest. i hate myself, I'm garbage and good for nothing. i lost hope, i don't even want happiness or any sort of thing. I'm already broke.

 

[FuneralCry]

Your feelings are understandable. I've always seen existence as being so horrible with it's endless problems and suffering. I've never wanted to be here at all and I envy those who have left this world.

 

[Mashedout]

If you need positivity. This is it. Watch this and then watch it again and if you don't feel it, watch it once more time. This mentality is the key towards surviving in this life. I believe life itself is too inherently flawed to care about at all, but most people who are low don't actually believe that so I still share positivity with them. They're just going through pain and choosing that outlook in the moment, overall they still value life. You can elevate your low state to a higher ones with your actions from moment to moment if that is actually what you wish.

 

[Death is my goal]

If you need positivity. This is it. Watch this and then watch it again and if you don't feel it, watch it once more time. This mentality is the key towards surviving in this life. I believe life itself is too inherently flawed to care about at all, but most people who are low don't actually believe that so I still share positivity with them. They're just going through pain and choosing that outlook in the moment, overall they still value life. You can elevate your low state to a higher ones with your actions from moment to moment if that is actually what you wish.

thank you but like i said i already gave up, couldn't care less about positivity. wasn't seeking help just venting.

 

[theboy]

You are going through strong emotional moments. I hope you find peace

 

[quiet.rabbit]

it's so depressing, especially with college.
I feel so overwhelmed yet i feel empty. i do nothing and feel bad about it. everyday is the same. I don't have the power mentally and physically. can't fill the void in my heart. i can't let go of this horrible feeling, this pain, this miserable life. i can't tell anyone or even cry to get things out of my chest. i hate myself, I'm garbage and good for nothing. i lost hope, i don't even want happiness or any sort of thing. I'm already broke.

You've just described how I'm doing right now perfectly. Been a NEET for 2 years now and just thinking about basic things like diet makes me shake physically.

For me it's the fact that there is real pressure and real consequences now, but I still have the mind of a child.

And the additional weight of regretting my wasted school years *ucks with me even more.
Like I dug myself into this hole!! Could I have had a normal life if I'd just accepted help as a kid? There's days where I feel so guilty I can't do anything but shake in my bed and replay my past. Bullying really messed with my whole worldview. It made me refuse experiences that could have helped me develop. It made potential mentors give up on me because of what they perceived as laziness. It made me hide my feelings as I believed them to be inadequate. It made me unable to meet myself. I know none of my strengths, I have no accomplishments. No nice memories. And I don't understand others.

But now that I'm an adult there is no excuse. People really do hate me now and they have a valid reason to. I'm a real burden now.